I would give a lifetime for a moment more

When I first met you, I noticed your eyes. They were blue and intense.
When I first talked to you, I noticed your smile. your smile was natural and you had dimples.
When I first was kissed by you, I noticed myself melting.
When you first held me close, I noticed time standing still.
When we married, I knew I wanted you for the rest of my life.
When I said I wanted to die a day before you, so I did not have to live without you in my life, I meant it. You kissed me and proceeded to discuss our son or daughters latest antics.

Throughout the years I felt very special and we were always close. Yes, we had our times but I would be more worried if we did not argue and yell. Each of us, being hard headed would not let the other person win, regardless of who was right or wrong. I loved the passion that I felt with you. Passion with work, home, family, love, and me, you always had so much to give. I loved the new experiences I had with you. Las Vegas, camping, flying to Buffalo, moving cross country, skiing, New Orleans, Jack in the Box after The Library. I remember seeing you in your Senior Chief uniform (swoon) then in your officer uniform (swoon again)! You would change your shoulder boards so often I could not keep up with the advancements. You were amazing in the military. I knew you missed it so much.
I feel all of these memories and try my best to remember more.

For that is all I have now.

The smell of your shaving cream.
Me scaring you in the shower.
The smell of your cologne.
The smell of your deodorant, which I did not like at all, but would give my soul to smell it on you again.

When I last saw you on Sunday, I was upset with you, but seeing you trying to sit up and talk to me, was enough for me to come over and kiss you goodbye. I came back and gave you another kiss and tried to be short with you when I told you to have crabs for breakfast. I then left you for the week.

Every night we talked and we said, "Goodnight and I love you". Each night I went to bed, content and thinking of you, a bit sad that I had a huge bed with a million pillows to myself. I was anxious to finish the week and meet you down south for a weekend of fun, friends and an amazing time.

I am mad at times, wondering why you had to go. We had so many plans

Did you know??????

Did you know that Lorton, Virginia is named for a village in England? It is the hometown of Joseph Plaskett, who settled in this area running a general store and opened the post office in 1875. Did you know that the Lorton Reformatory detained 168 women from the women’s suffrage movement from the Washington DC area from June to December of 1917? Did you also know that Lorton was where the Nike Missile site was built in 1955? This missile site stayed in Lorton until the 1970’s.

A couple more great landmark Plantations on the Potomac in Lorton are the Belvoir Plantation, (means beautiful view) and Gunston Hall homes to Lord George Fairfax and George Mason respectively. The idea of guaranteed individual rights grew in the fertile minds on the river banks of the Lorton area. The American Heritage was cultivated in Lorton and Virginia.

On the tip of Mason Neck you can find a few Bald Eagles. Mason Neck NWR was established in 1969 for the protection of nesting, feeding, and roosting habitat for the Bald Eagles. It was the first federal refuge established specifically for the (then endangered) Bald eagle. The refuge is part of the Potomac River NWR Complex.
The refuge, situated along the Potomac River on the Mason Neck peninsula, consists of 2277 acres of oak-hickory forest, freshwater marshes, and has 4.4 miles of shoreline. The refuge has the largest fresh water marsh in Northern Virginia, the largest Great Blue heron rookery in the Mid-Atlantic region (over 1400 nests), is a designated RAMSAR site, and hosts over 200 species of birds, 31 species of mammals, and 44 species of reptiles and amphibians.

Eagles use the mature forests for shelter and nesting sites and the marshes, bays, and river for foraging and hunting. The refuge was listed as one of the top ten sites in the country for viewing Bald eagles.

Hurdles that affect everyone

I have them, just like everyone else.

I have hurdles that I do not think I can overcome.

I need to get back to work.  I have taken off more than enough time to do what I need to and now that I played around with teaching and know t is  not my cup of tea right now, I need to look at other options.  I feel that I have had more jobs in the past year than I have had my entire life.  I just cant find my niche. 

I miss Brian at times like these.  He would keep me on the straight an narrow and encourage me to succeed as best as I could.

I need that strength again.
I appear weak, when I am not.

Oh I miss you so much sometimes, it just kills me inside.