A few people have asked about the funny parts of my surgery, since I always try to find a few.

So here goes.

Wednesday we had to be at the hospital at 530 in the morning. Yes in the morning people... you all were still sleeping while I was wondering if I should go to the bathroom now or later...

That meant getting up at 430, and that makes for a grumpy jessica, especially since I did not get to have my coffee.

We get to the place, and I am outside while Brian is parking the car and the doors are locked. I see a lady in the office, but I am not sure if I am at the right place. So then I see a light around the building and start walking to it... and of course it is nothing, and then I start freaking out because it is still very dark and spooky at 515 in the morning. I go back to the doors that still wont open and just stand there like an idiot till she turns around and looks in my direction. She lets me in, and starts complaining that the cleaning crew is waxing the floors and that they should not be in there, and all I am thinking of it, how professional is this? Will they slip while poking me in the stomach? Will the nurse play slip and slide while wheeling me out to post-op?

Then the insurance people call me in to make sure that they will get paid and ask me all of these questions and fill out forms and sign more forms that when I did when we bought the house.

Then I go wait again, and then this small foriegn lady comes and gets me. She was hilarious. She took me to my bed in the recovery room. She looks at me and then looks at the gown through the bag.. and says i be right back. I get you better gown. I am sure she said Bigger, but we are going to go with Better.. okay? So then she tells me to take everything off, and put the gown and socks on. Wow talk about feeling exposed. Then she made me sit in the bed all relaxed and comfy, she goes to get me a blanket and she says oh these are too cold, I get you a warm one. I yell STOP.. cold blanket fine, I am too hot. I am starting to adopted her language. so then I have a 'cold' blanket but all of us know how hot I get so it was not cold for long.

She then did the IV in the hand... omg I couldn't look there was pain, and I think that my head turned around a few times. People kept coming over to ask me questions and none of the nurses or doctors were as cute as they were on the television. I was going to ask but I am sure that they were still in bed since they needed their beauty sleep.

So then the anestegiolgist comes over and tells me how he is going to put me in never never land, and i can hardly wait but details people details... to make sure that they have the perfect concoction for me. Then they shoot some stuff in my IV and I felt a little woozy for a minute then I was gone. I sure hope that I did not snore. I worried about snoring for about a week before the surgery. Oh and I forgot to tell you, the night before we just had to go to chili's for dinner, and that morning I think I had bowel cramps but wasn't sure and did not want to go in the bathroom that they had there so then I was wondering if I was able to hold it until after the surgery. After that shot of whatever they gave me, I didnt care LOL

I did when I woke up though, and my throat was so sore, I could not swallow, and I wanted water right now... ice cold water... and I had an oxygen mask over my mouth.

As soon as I woke up I immediately thought, did I poo in there and who could I ask if I was snoring....

they took me to a different area since the regular rooms were booked, so I just had a hysterectomy, and they put me with the babies and their mommies. I didn't mind though, I love the smell of babies and as long as my boobs didnt start lactating when they cried I was happy.

I have more to tell but I think it is bedtime.


Wordless Wednesday not today!

So before I went under the knife I made a trip to Costco to pick up some snacks, yogurt and food. I saw this:

Now I love to make pancakes and I love to eat them. I mixed whatever I can and usually add an egg for some fluffiness. I have been known to put vanilla extract, blueberries, maple extract, strawberries and other stuff in the house to the mix, stir cook and eat! I found this HUGe bag of pancake mix at Costco, and it was only 6 bucks so guess what? I bought it. The entire bag will make 224 pancakes. I am thinking that it is going to be around for a long time, since I only will make pancakes once every two weeks maybe. Now that I have this huge bag of mix I was thinking of making batter and cook breakfast for the family in the morning. This would mean that I have to get up in the morning and actually roll out of bed and make them!



It seems that the animals are recouperating right a long with me. I enjoy the company, but there is only so much room on the couch. I wonder if they do this while I am at work every day? I am glad that they get along so well but is there a limit...


How things change

This month has been a whirlwind of hard choices, a few regrets and many other things that my friends are experiencing. For me, I have been through a lot, but I am fine now so you don't have to ask anymore. I love the kind thoughts the nice cards and awesome words.... but there is so many other people who have it worse than I do, and when I get that warm hug or smile I think to myself, "ya know... so and so could use this more than I can right now" Of course you can't say that to anyone, but if your reading this I hope you know where I am coming from without hurt feelings and paranoia. Many people have things worse off, many people within our grasp. There is such a larger picture out there, and I am just a pixel. Yes, I just made that up but it sounded very good huh?

I am still on the mend, I went a bit sat bhit crazy today, but it all worked out in the wash, Bryant took me driving around, since I can't drive for another week and a few days and you know I am counting down the days.

I have so many things on my mind, my son is getting older and making some outrageous decisions on his own. I aplaude him for having some common sense while making some decisions I also want to wring his neck at some of the recent adventures that he has had me on. I am sure it will continue since he has another year of high school. I tell you though, he has a new girlfriend and I really like her. She seems to have a good head on her shoulders and she is already taking over babysitting Bryant and making sure he gets all of his homework done. She is nice, and I hear them laughing a lot. That is a much needed improvement!!!! His attitude has been so nice!!!


Good Bye Elvis

I am home, and under a lot of pain medication.

The surgery went very well and they did find some more endrometrious. (sp).
I already feel better knowing that I wont have to wear black pants for 3 weeks out of the month.
I already feel better knowing that I will not be rolling on the ground trying to breath my way out of the cramps.

The hospital stay was interesting, I had some of the weirdest nurses I have ever met. One of them came in at 3 in the morning for my pain meds and brought up a chair and started talking to me. They had my in the OB/GYN area where all of the cute newborns are, and many of the nurses are older and not educated in the laproscopy procedures. They could not believe that I had a hysterectomy and was already walking around and really not needing pain meds, but I took them so my body could rest. They asked all sorts of questions like my favorite was, "did they just suck it through your belly button?" I wanted to ask "when did you graduate from nursing school? It was good though, they took really good care of me, and I had my own room. I got to drink all of the water and ice chips I wanted and the beef broth was not one of my favorites. LOL.

I am going to sleep now, more tomorrow.


Hello Uterus!

Obviously by the title you can tell that I am not talking about bacon today, nor am I talking about planting or photography so if you are a normal male you might want to move on.

I am on the phone now, on hold with my doctor's office. They have not called me to tell me everything that is going to happen and to tell me that I am being over cautious and extremely difficult right now. I am waiting for them to tell me what to expect and why the hell I am going to be off work for 6 weeks. I don't quite understand the entire process and since I am paying for it, I should be getting color by number steps of exactly what they are going to do. I am not difficult in any means. i just want to request that someone hold my hand through the entire procedure and whisper sweet nothings in my ear and watch for tears coming out of my eyes in case I am still awake during the procedure. Yes, I know I watch too much television, but hey at least if it does happen I know exactly what to do right? So I guess that they are going to call me back with all of the anwers to my questions and give me peace of mind. I hate being difficult because then I am afraid she, the doctor, is going to say... well, if you are going to be this bitchy about the entire thing I am not going to do it to you! You are going to have to live with the pain of life for the rest of your life ahaha. I love the doctor, I just never had a hospital procedure done, with an overnight stay that has been planned before so this is fun. I am sure my mother would be on the phone and would stay on the phone till she gets all of the answers she needs, if she was here, I would make her do all of the work while I continued to live in my dream world.

OK so I am going to be away for a day or so, I dont want no one to worry, I have planted crops on farmville that I wont have to harvest for 4 days. If I dont answer the phone, I am sure I cannot due to the fact that I have a mouth full of bon bon's so just leave a message and I will get back to you!!!!


Quantico Golf Course

If you are ever in the area I can honestly say that if you golf you must go to Quantico golf course. The day was amazing. We left the Franconia Moose Lodge around 9 am and it was chilly and windy. Most of the golfers wore pants, I think there was only one person who wore shorts, and I wore capri's. I was worried becuase it was very cold and windy, and I was thinking that I picked the wrong outfit to wear.

Once we got there and started moving around I warmed up. The view is spectacular and each hole was amazing in itself. There were so many trees, to watch, the creek was moving since the recent rains and it was beautiful. I hit myself in the head many times for forgetting my camera. The day warmed up and I was glad that I did not wear pants or a long sleeved shirt. The day ended with an awesome sandwich from the club house. A pepper jack chicken with bacon sammich! It was great. A few drinks later, we headed back to the moose to celebrate a glorious day!


Bagels, bread and more bagels

Whenever I go 100 miles around San Diego I will drive there, to Ocean Beach to visit P L Bagel. This awesome bagel shop in on Voltaire street and is a family owned place, hole in the wall actually, and they have the best bagels. The bagels are crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside. Best thing is that they have mini bagels. My favorite is the sesame mini bagels, which you can get 12 of them for like 5 bucks. I can drive around, dipping the mini bagel in the cream cheese, I can only imagine what it would taste like on a toasted bagel

Then there is the homemade cream cheese. I finally scoured the internet and found a close recipe for the garlic, bacon and basil cream cheese that was the most intense taste in your most that was housed with bread. You take one taste of this cream cheese, and your tastebuds explode.

I am going to make these this weekend. I am going to put some bacon crispy of course in the food processor, grind till fine, then add some garlic and also some fresh basil.

I wish I could find a good bagel place. Right now my favorite is Safeway grocery. They make the best Sesame bagel!

Next week, the best coffee I have ever had!!


I am cured.... maybe

Okay so after yesterday I knew I had to go back on the porch and take care of the plants that I bought yesterday. I was going to conquer my fear of the bees and wasps. I walked out on the deck and of course the dog was no where to be found and not wanting to come out with me. I felt bad for her and stopped by the bakery and got her some doggie cookies. I dont want her to tell her daddy how mean I was to her LOL.
So I went outside... and I just kept my eyes on the task at hand, since I was alarmed but the condition of some of the plants and needed to transplant them right now. I took care of that, while listening to the wonderful noise of the bees buzzing by and the bumbles I didn't even pay attention too....

Who am I kidding?

I lasted 5 minutes, when I heard the bee buzz, I threw the soil in the air, grabbed my plants while keeping my mouth shut, ran in the house, dropped the plants and ran to the corner laid in the fetal position and cried.
Daisy walked past me as if to say, "told you so", then she did a nervous twitch and brought me a chew toy.


Sometimes things are just moody and some things are hysterical

You know how it is, not sure if you are feeding off of one person's moodiness or if it is your own moodiness swaying the vote. Today was one of those days. I felt like I could do nothing right and everything went downhill.
I did get out of the house after work, went to HD, Wally World and Nalls. Bought tomato's, jalapenos, yellow peppers and green peppers and some garden chili's. YUM!

Home is on my mind with the earth quakes. I remember trying to pretend that they did not bother me, but if one woke me up in the middle of the night I was awake the rest of the night, or when I was a child and an earthquake came through I would run to my mothers room, and she would be sleeping away, and I would be terrified. I would just stand there till the rolling went away and then go back to sleep until the next tremor happened. It was a memorable event in my childhood and one that I would not forget.

Since I went and bought all of these vegetables and herbs, I gathered that I would have to plant them, so into the shed I went, opening the door super wide and fast, while I throw myself to the ground so to miss any wasps, bees, hornets, or anything that flies faster than me. I then note that the coast was clear, so I get up and quietly and quickly go into the shed, grabbing the pots for the flowers and throw them out of the shed so anything that is hiding in there will leave. Plain and simple.
I then grab everything while dodging carpenter bees and go.. rather run inside and slam the door real fast before something follows me in. I love the warm weather and the longer nights, but I hate hate hate the bugs. Okay so I go upstairs, on the deck where the flowers are and try to maintain composure while bees and wasps are flying all over. Trust me when I say, I checked everywhere and cannot find the nest. So I run inside a few times while sucking in my breath really hard and even scaring Calvin and Daisy, I now have Daisy so paranoid that she is jumping at her own shadow and foaming at the mouth. So as soon as I start going for the door, the dog and the cat are already ahead of me, hoping not to be left outside. Some of the paranoia has been a false alarm so the dog has now developed a nervous tick from looking back and forth at me for my next move. The bees made her so mad today that she tried to eat one.. thank god I had my stun gun with me and just knocked her out cold while I screamed at the top of my lungs, "bees, omg bees" and drag Daisy inside with calvin already in the house awaiting my crazy self.

Can you believe we then had a dinner out there... he had snasages and I had chicken, with some macaroni salad and spinach dip since I didnt get any this weekend. So I was sitting on the chair... dog was also out there... so her nervous tick was going really well by then and whenever she would look up I thought she had her sights on a bee, so then I would jump and then I would hear the drive by buzzing and I would freak, throw my food a bit, then settle down, then Daisy would start freaking, ticking and I swear her eyebrow twitched a bit. I think Daisy has a case of heart burn since she could not enjoy her meal without her having to swallow it whole since I was making her twitch even while she was eating. Or making her run from the deck to the inside and she refuses to leave her food outside.

Okay so got through that.
I was then in the basement reading my people magazine that just came in the mail... and I felt something crawl up my arm....
it crawled
I ... looked at it....
I screamed and jumped and screamed and jumped and hurled the magazine at the wasp (it was not a bee omg it was a wasp) I flew out of the couch and across the room so fast that I would qualify it as aerobic exercise. Now the wasp during all of this was knocked out for a bit and yes I could have taken the magazine that was still clutched in my hands and smash it into the couch till it was dead. But.. instead and just stood there till the damn thing stopped flying around and then, I ran upstairs at top speed and made the man of the house kill and destroy it.

When he went downstairs it was still in the same spot as it was when I left the basement so I think I scared the wasp more than I was scared myself. I swatted that thing so hard he didnt have a chance to sting me omg!

Weekend wrap-up

Friday - blur
Saturday - blur
Sunday - nice

More to come.