Armed with Cheesecake and Vodka, World Watch Out, I'm Back!

I knew it would take time but still I still get teary eyed at my desk when my phone will ring and I get a bit excited inside. I cannot watch family movies that have a death in them. I have tried many times, and I get antsy and wind up with anxiety. I do not look forward to the holidays at all.  There was a time last year, where everything was good, and I actually bought Halloween candy, cooked a feast at Thanksgiving and looked forward to putting the Christmas tree up.  This year not so much.  I am hoping these two little rascals get me out of my mood and into the holiday spirit. Too many things on my plate right now and it is not fair at all.  I read things from friends that are going through rough times and I can't even finish reading it.  I always think that time will ease all wounds and doing new things will help ease the pain.  But it doesn't.  Right now, today I want to pack up my car and move to a town that has internet, fast internet ...

Calvin doesn't get enough airtime here.  He had a talk with me this morning, in between petting his belliz.  Hello World I iz your Supreme Master.  Call me Sire Calvinator of Honeckshire. I haz profile fit for a King.          I demand food.  NOW       Iz see my prisoner.  I own her. I run to her often for pets               You take pictures of my bellies.  Rub my belliz.  NOW I haz an itch I lick you clean  Belly... Now.... I lub my ping pong balls

I was lying in bed last night and as soon as I realized what I realized I sat up.   Shocked   Flabbergasted   Bewildered   Saddened   I laid back down slowly as I absorbed what I just realized   I felt it all the way to my core     I had no one to tell all of my secrets to.   Sure, I could start talking to Calvin the Cat, but he is so opinionated and selfish that I would be more wishy washy than I already am.   I always spoke to Daisy, who would look at me with her eyes, as if to say, “You have got to be kidding me”   Calvin just looks at me and says F*ck You!!!

If you have a dog, you know what an amazing heart they have.  They know when you are sick, sad or in need of some love.  They know when you need them and they know when it is okay to leave you, Miss Daisy came into our lives in 2003.  She was a rescue dog who was abused in her former home.  She was instantly loved by our family, loved and spoiled.  We had to go through an extensive interview process and the rescue group had to visit our home and meet the entire family. The very first day we brought her home, Grams (Brian’s Grandmother) named her.  It was either Lily or Daisy, because the dog reminded Grams of a ray of sunshine, it was spring, when new things are born and grams loved her flowers.  I taught Miss Daisy how to sit, the first few hours we owned her.  She wanted to please us terribly, or she just wanted another cookie.  She was a smart dog and knew who loved her, or rather knew the hand that fed her.  I would like to say, sh...