OMG Look a Whale!!!

Okay, so I am warning you in advance not to be drinking any liquid, or chewing something that might inadvertantly make you choke.

Went to the gym tonight for an Abs & Back class. It started at 6, went to the grocery store picked up a few things that we needed, since it is so cold outside it would be fine while we were at the gym. Arrived at the gym 25 minutes early so I did a bike race for 20 minutes and the boys went for a run. As the clock started inching closer to the time of DOOM, I started wondering when the last time was that I spent 10 minutes on my Abs let alone thirty minutes. It has been a long time, probably since I was still with K12. I walked in and see a few people larger than me, thank god, but this is Gold's Gym and even at the beginning of the year, I dont see too many larger women in there, which is a shame because they have some excellent classes. Did I mention the Abs and Back ckass? I grab a mat and find a spot on the side, since I was new to the class I didnt want to get in anyone's way, or rather I didn't want anyone watching my uncoordinated self. The boys follow me and we make ourselves at home and I wonder if it is too late to run out of the room screaming.

I start stretching out, so I look like I know what I am doing, and start checking out the competition. Yes, I said competition, I am very competitive as you ALL should know and I need something to keep me coming back, some one to beat out. Anyways, I'm stretching, glancing at the thin 20 somethings and secretly cursing them for even being in this class, I wonder if I could shove a sammich down their throat real quick or at least some guac and chips ya know. I see a lady behind me, she is bigger, and older than me, and she seems like she doesn't even want to be in the class. Remember her for later.

The instructor comes in, this chipper, happy young lady who was very nice, and telling everyone in the class that there are many people here because it is the new year and in a few weeks they wont be here anymore. I looked around to see if anyone was looking at me. I'm good, I have already determined that I will not be one of the "oh it's the new year so lets jump on the 'get healty' train" So I already have a goal. She starts us on the first round of stomach crunches, Im hanging in there, I notice the heavy breathing from one of the boys next to me, I look over, his face is all red and his eyeballs are getting ready to pop out. I told him to breath, and he started laughing, I guess he accidently had some gas... I will leave it at that... Just picture in your mind, a 17 year old trying to hang with his parents, and a crowded room, while doing crunches. Some of the things I could not do at all, or I did not have the coordination to do the correctly, so I just did regular crunches. I would try to look at the other people in the room, but they all had their own way of doing things and after awhile all I thought of was weeds growing from the ground, but not as graceful. I imagined myself trying to do what I thought everyone else was doing, and all I could imagine was 3 beached whales stuck in the sand, while flailing their arms back and forth trying to get back into the water. I could not even sit up from the laying down part, I had to go at it sideways, so I have many many goals in front of me with this class and I think that I am going to like it. I look around me to see who is still with it, and I see her... the one that the instructor talked about, the one that will be gone within 2 weeks because she either will not see results or she is just going to quit. She was not even trying. I understand if it is hard for people, but it seemed like when we were doing crunches that she just laid there and lifted her legs in the air. I hope that she comes back and tries harder. I mean, why would you even bother coming to a class and putting your knees on the wafer thin mat for nothing? This mat was so thin that when we were on our hands and knees I went from elbows to feet in order to NOT have my knees on that mat, omg that hurt more than the crunches, so I did the harder way for awhile. There was also 7 guys there, including my two, which was pretty cool!

I am sitting at home now, watching the new season of the Biggest Loser, and even my fingers are starting to stiffen up. I called my girlfriend and was just rolling in laughter telling her what I thought we all looked like. I love to find humor in these scenario's.

I am just wondering what is next.

Did I mention the classes that they have there? Next class for me to do: Tomorrow morning 5:15 Body Pump class. 45 minutes of pure hell.

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