6/22/2010

The rest of the Nawlins story! oh wait there will be more

So why are you all asking about my drunk shopping night? I am sure many of us have been there.. you have a few drinks then you go shopping at the mall. It's the same as going to the grocery store hungry. You tell yourself not to do it but you do!

So it was Saturday night in New Orleans and I already had the SOOKIE draw going, and thought of buying a house and keeping vampires in my basement, but of course I didn't have a job down there, and riding a donkey and buggy as a tour guide really didn't interest me, cuz ya know it's outside with the heat, and the bugs. I also could not see me steering a boat showing people gators when I would be using my arms to swat bugs out of my face instead of steering the boat. I could tell fortunes, but I would be freaking people out. I wouldn't be so nice about everything. When I got my fortune told or rather tarot cards read, the death card came up, and I breathed in and the 'dude' said oh don't worry that really doesn't have to deal with you. Umm hello, my fortune, my 20 bucks, my death card. So then the 'dude' and I use that 'dude' term loosely, tells me that it is some dark haired person that will be out of my life soon. I am like thinking to myself, omg he is sooo right. Not with that, but he got all of the generic answers right LOL. I would be telling the people, hey, someone is going to die, the world is coming to an end, go on a cruise and read the book, "Don't sweat the small stuff" sell all of your stuff, buy an RVB and travel. So obviously I wouldn't make too much money off of that! I didn't see that 'dude' again, since of course they all came to play after our bedtime! So I told myself there will be no working in a bar, picking crawddads out of the swamp and making gumbo out of swamp stuff (true story).So I told my partner that we were not going to buy a house and make friends with vampires, but we were going to go home to the real world the next day! And just when the Werewolves are coming out!

So that prompted some drinking. Not as much as Friday, but enough to where we were having a
REALLY
GOOD
TIME

so the last souviner shop that we walked past, we knew that we JUST HAD to have that voodoo doll, and of course the skeleton on a Harley bike. Oh and let’s not forget the coffee and beignet mix that I was going to make the following weekend. Yes, it is still sitting on my shelf, it looks so good on there with all of my other trinkets from the trip that I do not want to disturb it. I also saw this mask with blue feathers and told myself it would look really good in my bedroom, since ya know the walls are umm blue. Yea good call. Then after the pictures on 100 year old slate, and the postcards and whatever else we bought... I am still pulling stuff out of the suitcase. Yesterday a few postcards fell out of a magazine I stole from the hotel room, and I thought, OMG I did buy those. Hmm like the 467 pictures that I took wasn't enough. I also wrote down all of my memories from the trip on a airplane barf bag. I thought that was a great idea when I was watching it on Tori and Dean, not so much when I am getting weird stares from the flight crew.
ANYWAYS
I have this box... of bread pudding. White chocolate bread pudding. I have no idea how to make it, but it sounded really good at the time. Kind of like that hotdog you get on every corner of Bourbon Street.
I haven't even thought of turning on my oven in order to make it. IN fact I haven't even read the box yet, cuz if I do, I am going to find myself rolling on the floor laughing at myself for buying the box and having to reminisce on the entire shopping spree that took all of 4 minutes to complete.
Do not take me shopping when I have been drinking.
I also bought a box of 16.00 pralines, haven't had one yet. Then I would have to admit that I have a shopping problem.
When we were at the airport it was brought to my attention how fast we were in and out of the store. Surprisingly, how two people could speed around the store, finding exactly what everyone wanted from the Big Easy and capturing it before someone else wanted it.
I feel as though someone took advantage of me
I wonder if there is a Twilight Zone episode for what happened to me.
I wanted to count how much money I spend and ask for a tax deduction since I was helping the economy that was hit hard during Katrina. OMG that is a great concept...

I am wondering if next time I go down there, if I can smuggle one of those horny gator drinks, and find out if there is really booze in there or some shopping type of viagra or spanish fly in the drink that encourages reckless spending. At least I didn't need a condom for that right?

I never told you how I came across the meaning of Spanish Fly, and I don't think you will ever find out...

I also did mention that I found a McChicken in my purse Friday night.

*sighs*

I am glad to be home.

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