Holidays are almost over

I have been bad about updating. I have had so much going on in my life. Bryant is doing well, except for the fact that he ditched school 4 days in a row, and he failed all of his classes for the interim. So it has been busy at our house. I walked him to class each and every day until christmas vacation, and I will be doing it again the next week he is back at school. It seems that he doesn't care if I am there and I am sure that a part of him real enjoys it. Sometimes I just want to shake some sense into him and ensure that he doesn't turn out to be one of those teenagers. LOL. So needless to say he is grounded. Yea during Christmas vacation and it does suck. I took away his Xbox, his phone and his ipod. He does still have his television but is only allowed to watch it during certain times of the week. He did not get some of the things that he wanted for Christmas, like the Xbox Live or the wii. Actually we could not find the Wii and could also not justify purchasing a 300 toy as in the Xbox live, so his punishment helped us make that decision. He is grounded until he brings home a report card with C's or better. Oh yes, and we are truly ruining his life, with as much as we are harassing him and beating him senseless, which we aren't. We are being parents.


Unfinished life lessons

With the Christmas season here, I was hoping that my son would learn to be a bit less selfish. I is all about what he wants. Odd because I never raised him to be like this, but he is rebelling I guess. I told him that some things we are not going to buy him only because he needs to get a job and earn the money to by the things he wants and learn how to save instead of blowing it all when he goes out on Friday nights to Kingstowne. I am of course assuming that he isn’t doing anything bad with the money, he never asks for more than 20 bucks at a time and most of the time it would be a Friday night so he could go to the movies and hang out. He has mentioned getting a job but I told him that his grades come first and he needs to bring up his biology grade. He blames the teacher hating him ,and instead of sticking up for him, I tell him that there are going to bepeople that he doesn’t get along with his entire life so he mind as well get used to it now, and learn how to adapt. He gets all pissy and says very mean things. I don’t know how to approach this without turning into the bad person because he really isn’t going to realize this until he has a job and his boss is an arse, and he has to work with him.


My son turns 15 today

Today he turned 15. The last year before he starts driving, the last year before he goes to work, and probably the last year that I can have a say in what he wears. The only thing that I complain about it the low pants which promptly gets fixed when I am around. Today he starts to realize that what he does now impacts his entire life. Did you hear about those 4 14 year old that stole the car and killed a 18 year old by running over him/her?? I do not want that to be my son. Today he realized that he is going to be a man and any day now he could be a father. (OMG!)Today I reflected on how he was born, the many hours I was in labor (18 hours),HARD back labor. Got to love it. I remember this one girl who came with me and she was so scared that she hid behind a chair in the room. I wonder if she has had any kids. Leslie was her name. I remember Bryant having the biggest brown eyes when he was born and I remember how perfect his complexion was, not a single red spot or pimple on his face, and to this day he does not know what acne is. I remember his first day of school, with Mrs Johnson and how no matter how much he tired her out, she taught him to read. She taught him to love school. She taught me how to get rid of LICE OMG!! (tea Tree oil by the way) I remember his first time riding a bike, skateboard, swimming and skiing. He never had to be taught, he just got on it and started to do it. That was exciting. Today I thought about what type of dad he is going to be. I can kinda tell from how he treats the animals and how he treats me. I think that he is going to be a good dad, very attentive and always wanting to be a part of it. I also know that he is going to need a night out with the boys, he like to relax. I told him I want four kids. He told me that he would have three as long as he can make enough money so the mom can stay home until she wanted to go to work. He remembers me and my mom staying home to take care of him when he was younger. I think that made a big impact on his upbringing. Today I pray that he will be a good person and think of others. I pray that he will be successful and know how to survive.Today I pray.


Question of the day

What skills are you teaching your teenage son that will help him survive in his own apartment one day?

I am hoping that I have already taught my son what he needs in order to survive. I am hoping that I have given him enough tools in order to succeed in a crisis and emergencies when money is tight and you have to use your common sense. I have taught him how to shop on a budget, if he does it that is up to him. I don't know if he will have to go through some of the trials and tribulations that I went through growing up. I knowingly put myself in that position, away from home, on my own. A studio apartment and I had to share a bathroom with other people. I still remember those times, and at times I can pick up on the smells that I remember from that place when I am in strange parts of town! I hope that I have taught him how to make a chicken stretch for more than one day, and that you have to pay your rent, car and other bills before you can go out and play. I hope that I showed him how to iron properly and to do a load of wash with separated clothes.

We shall see

4 hours of school is a killer

Ok so the boy had to go to school today. He wanted to stay home and watch television all day eat scones, read the paper and stay in jammie ALL DAY. I made him go to school. When was the last time that I could stay home and STAY IN MY JAMMIE ALL DAY LONG???? It has been awhile. I have tried, I get my big bowl of coffee, and sit on the recliner getting ready to watch all the morning shows my mind can soak up in one sitting. The guilt starts when a commercial comes on, my coffee is empty so I go upstairs, while taking a load of clean clothes with me. Then when the morning light hits my kitchen you can see every single peice of dirt on the floor and mark on my white counter tops. So then I tell myself, ill just celan it up wont take that long, two hours later, I have a diet coke and am getting ready to sit back into the reclinder, when the dog wants outside. I let her out, realize that the leaves are all over the yard, and also dog messes, I proceed to shut the door and go back and sit down, then get back up and next commercial and spend the next 20 minutes raking and cleaning the yard (small yard). Needless to say the day is shot to hell cuz now I need a shower and can cook and mess up the kitchen, do wash.. omg let me stop here.
My sons day off - sleep till 10 am. watch cartoons in bed for about an hour. walk downstairs, get a bowl of cereal, take dog dowstairs, dropping cerreal on the way down, dog picks it up.. lets the dog out, forgets to bring recycling until he hears the truck coming and tries to carry the bin inside and up the stairs and drips all over my carpet... misses the recycling man, takes stuff ack downstairs, hoping the beer smell dries off of his shirt so he doesnt have to go upstairs to change shirt. Eats another bowl of cereal since he is having brunch. 2 hours later, makes a grilled cheese since he forget he partook on brunch. Dogs bowls are empty. Bryant throws the dog a bone. and so on...


No more football

Bryant has been trying to spend his time doing productive things around the house since he is not in football any more. He has forgotten to take out the garbage, left dirty dishes in the sink and complained about being bored. He is starting to eat me out of house and home. If I buy ice cream, it is fine til I open the ice cream then in two days it is gone. So I do not buy ice cream. Same goes with if I make a pie and/or cake, he is a cake person. He is not a huge chocolate eater, nor chips and such. And he loves to drink my fresca. At least it is healthy?

Today he tells me that he is going to stay late after school and hang out. Does he not realize that he has a project due byt he end of the month and the rest of the month is going to fly by because of all the holidays? He also has a biology test this Friday - I got him to make flash cards but he has not looked at them. And looking at them while in the bathroom just does not count. Needless to say I will not be testing him with him flashcards. He was cool this weekend, hung out with me most of the time and helped out at the Moose Sunday and talked M into hiring him back on friday nights, since the person that works there now sucks. He usually makes about 100 bucks a night, can you imagine how much he is going to make when he gets a real job. Yes, I know this is a real job but the only reason why he works here is becuase he is not old enough to work at a regular restaurant. I am thinking he is going to go for Red Hot and Blue up the street since we are friends with one of the managers. Who knows. I told him to stay away from fast food.

He wants to move out again and even told me that when he has enough money he will help me out so that we dont have to move back with him.. odd boy he is.


Things I want my son to experience

Number one - to experience financial hardship, to have to figure out how to make that check last until the next one, and which bills are more important that the other, want him to know what it is like to work for things that you need as well as want, and to learn what is the difference between wants and needs - yet appreciate how well he has it when he is able to get a want, and to know what it is like to savor it.

Number two - I want him to experience being a father. his father was not always there for him and I have taught Bryant everything I can about unconditional love and everything in between. I want him to be able to experience the feeling when a newborn is placed in your arms and that feeling at that moment. I also want him to finally realize what it means to him to be daddy's little girl.

Number three - i want him to experience death so he knows how valueable life is and to live it to its fullest.

Halloween downers

Son did not dress up as a girl, him and D chickened out at the last minute, which was fine. They left the house around 7, I hardly saw any trick or treaters at all. It was a shame, I love to see all the costumes that the kids dress up in now adays. Amazing how many people think that wearing street clothing qualifies you for free candy. But the one kid said he was a street rat.. I was going to give him a piece of cheese and see what he would have said to that. But, I chose to be the adult here LOL.

Drove son to school this morning and of course I had to drop him off a block away, in the dark so he wouldn't be seen with me. Not that I was disappointed cuz then I didnt have to make any turns to get on the beltway.

I think that this weekend is going to be fun, the entire family is going to go to Calleo for a Moose pool tournament. Bryant is going to be playing and I think that he has gotten so much better with his playing that he should rock a few of them there men's world. We are leaving Friday around noon and getting back on Sunday of course. Son has been playing pool for 3 years now, and it definately shows.


My Space

ok so I log on to see what my son has been up to in the wonderful world of MySpace and I see that he has a new picture taken. He has no shirt on. This is from the teenager that doesn't want his mother to see him without a shirt yet the entire universe can see he happy trail. So interesting. Anyways, I just logged on to see what he was up too. I cant believe he has 286 friends though. I wonder who they are, he never wants to talk to me so I now know it is becuase he is sooo tired from talking to everyone else. I then sign into his hotmail account, and find out he also has a facebook account. He is on more networks than I am. Interesting how easy it is for kids to catch on to these things.

Pirate Picture of Bryant

Halloween Night

My son thinks that he can go around the enighborhood getting free candy with just a mask on. I have told him for all these years how much fun it was to make the costume and wear it on this great pumpkin night. He doesn't get it and I am wondering if it is a Girl thing. I made his costumes when he was younger and he always won pizes for them. One year he was a werewolf and I think I used too much superglue on his face for the hair, particularly near his hair line. He was not very happy when it came time to take off the hair. Needless to say, he went to school for a few days with sideburns.

Tonight he might dress up like a girl, I told him I had some skinny clothes that he can borrow and I can do their makeup. That would be cute. I dont think that I am going to do the block party thing tonight, I want to stay inside (its cold out) brrrr.


The weekend was fast and with Homecoming done this means that the holidays are right around the corner. I can't believe it.
Halloween, Thanksgiving, a few birthdays, then Christmas and then some more birthdays. Ugh. I have no idea how I am going to organize all of this, but a fellow blogger is turning me on to something, so I am going to use it and see how it goes. Hopefully it will help the days go by more organized. I do not want to be busy each and every day of the holidays but I want to make sure that I get everything done for them. Interesting I am going to see how this goes. I printed off all of the forms that i am going to think that I will use and then go from there. i want to make sure that this holiday year, the first successful one since I have been back in the house and I want to make sure that it is perfect. I want to have all the dinners and parties at my house and I am hoping that it will be very successful.


One Two.. Breath.. focus...

The chill of fall has come and with that comes warmer blankets and snuggle time. I will enjoy putting the shorts and short sleeved shirts away for sweats, cozy sweaters, and socks. Saturday someone had their fireplace going which means that soon we will havet to scope out some firewood of our very own. We haven't had to buy firewood forever. Since when our neighbors moved they gave us theirs.
This was my yesterday afternoon
I am PMSing and no I did not have a relaxing night. Let me tell you =)
Went to work yesterday, went to the grocery store at lunch so I wouldn't have to do it after work. So I get off of work, LATE... Go get in the car and drive half way down the garage... Forgot the checkbook, since Brian needed today. So then I am screaming as I am driving back to the fourth floor, get out of car, walk all the way back into the building, go to my floor, and walk all the way down the corridor, get said checkbook, and then repeat process to get to car.. Drive in rush hour traffic... To get home, put groceries away, realize I forgot bread... Have to go to another grocery store... Then I am dealing with Brian who had security detail last night so didn’t get off of work till 6, he is going to get Bryant, he is late cuz of traffic, so instead of calling Bryant to tell him to wait, he calls me... I am coming out of grocery store with dinner, and yes I got the bread... Phone is ringing that gawd awful "oh where oh where" I at this point have to put groceries into handicap chair so I can find my frigging phone in my darn suitcase.. Find the phone and am trying to remain calm. He tells me about his traffic woes, so I ask him, did Bryant call you? "no" he says, so I then ask, "did you call Bryant" he then says NO.. I then want to scream into the phone, "Then why in the hell are you calling me when you should be calling Bryant. Instead in my calm voice, I say "oh, ok umm then I will call him." and I did call Bryant... And after I tell him Brian is running late he says can you tell him... I made him call Brian himself and tell him whatever he was going to say. OMG then I get home and have to run around the house to make sure nothing is out of order.. Well not really but pretty much... I have a strong screwdriver... Deal with Brian bitching and watching him eat dinner... Go downstairs to actually relax.. It is 7:53.. Ask Brian if he wants a diet coke, he says yes.. I get the diet coke and a beer for me. LOLOLOL..
And then after all this whe wanted sex omg!!!!!
Needless to say I am not much better today as he has emailed me about not finding his damn blue socks 20 times today. I am going to go and buy him a pair and make him eat them.
So don't mind me if I am bitchy tonight.


End of a long weekend

Break the cycle of Domestic Abuse. However hard, there is always someone who can help. I know of people who will take care of dogs, help find a place to live and job skills.

I am supposed to be studying right now, it is going. I am having a hard time getting my act together. Info systems is easy, but the finance is just something that I cannot get. I have to read some more and make a better effort I guess.

I should hear something about the job this week. I am hoping that I get it. Me and the hubinator have been thinking about getting a double wide down in Conway, near Myrtle Beach. They are inexpensive and if I can afford the mortgage with my raise I am going to do it. We shall see, a friend on mine nad I will be driving down for a road trip.

Darn, I have cramps again. Why is that? I do not want any more children, I have a teenager and he keeps me plenty busy.

Speaking of - we left him alone today and gave him a list of chores to do... he did them, his way... I asked him to take the clothes out of the dryer... he did, and he put them on top of the dryer. I asked him to clean out the cat box, he did... and left all the cat litter on the floor, which is in HIS bathroom... odd. I am glad I only have one, I dont think I could have handled any more than him...

I cant wait to go back to work heh!
Maybe then I will find time to tell you about my weekend. It was good but very busy, more on this tomorrow.


Old post from other blog...

I took Bryant to work this morning, he is helping a friend with his new house. so I jumped out of bed and threw tennies on. dropped him off and on my way back home, i was behind a white truck, that was not slowing down for a red light, i was talking to Brian on the phone and i said omg he is going to go through the red light and BAM the white truck hits a nice black car and should have flipped over, but drove on two wheels for a fwe seconds before coming back down on all four tires. She must have been going faster than the speed limit. SO all this happens, I hang up with Brian park on the side and get out of my car since no one else was frigging idiots... and then i see that i am wearing my jammies with no bra.. wonderful omg!!!! Cant think of myself. I go over to the lady of the black car and she is shaking, she is fine... she just got the new car last week, and i told her i saw everything and the other driver ran the red light and I was right behind her. VDOT got out of their trucks and went to the other driver, omg she could have hit that big orange truck cuz they said when they saw her coming, they stopped. SO now I am talking to the VDOT people with jammes and no bra...Cops come, they take down my information, information from the lady with jammies and no bra on, and they were hot men omg!! The blck lady opens her back door nad omg there is a little boy in there, thank the lord he was ok. He was in a 5 point car seat, around 2 and he was very calm. The lady is calling her mom, crying. Telling me her new car is all over telegraph road. So the the firetrucks with more hot men showup to see the lady with her jammies on and no bra. that was it. I wished the lady well told her that the police have my information and good luck. As i was walking back to my car, im holding my front so my boobs dont jiggle LOL, then the ambulance shows up.Moral of the story, when you see an accident and three cars have not stopped, just stop to make sure everyone is ok, don't be afraid that they are dead or dying, your adrenaline will kick in and take over (flight or fight). When we lived in Sicily and being military you had to stop if there was not three cars on the side of the road already. If you didnt, you can risk losing your driving priveledges. I would want them to stop for me ya know. Anyways - I have a bra on and will keep one in my car for emergencies

My 25 things

Twenty five things that make me really happy
1) getting my new People Magazine in the mail, untorn
2) Hubby going out of town
3) Waking up on Saturday monring early and without a hangover
4) Hazelnut Coffee
5) Weekends of free pay channels
6) Finishing a good book
7) Jamming on the stereo on the way home from work
8) Getting to go to the grocery by myself
9) Leftover lasagna
10) The smell of the beach
11) Having clean sheets on the bed on Sunday mornings
12) When my dog loves me
13) Taking a framable picture
14) Girls night out
15) winning, at anything
16) a really clean house
17) finding 20 bucks in the washer/dryer and not telling anyone
18) birthday cake in the fridge
19) the smell of oranges and cinnamon
20) boxes from Amazon on my porch
21) birthday gifts
22) having closets and drawers organized
23) grilled cheese and tomato soup
25) knowing that i am liked and loved

Today's word is M...

I stayed home today so that I could cook Stuffed Shells for 100 people tomorrow night. I have been up for 4 hours. Have I accomplished this? Well, I made it to the grocery store, bought said items, and came home, put items away and have been sitting in front of laptop and watching The Today show. The lady that sings the toes and wrinkles her nose song is on. Great fun happy song. I would love to be holding babies while this song was plaing and smelling their wonderful bodies.

Anyways.. yea too much coffee today, can you tell? Hubinator has a golf tournament for Make a Wish today so I have the entire house to myself. Of course I am not telling anyone that I took the day off. My secret, and of course any one who reads this.

Bryant had to sit out his first football game last night. He failed a biology test. Plain and simple. He failed. The entire ride home he had to tell me that it wasnt his fault. Finally I pulled to the side of the road and just let him have it. He is 14 years old and needs to start accepting responsibilty for his actions and needs to realize when he can be lazy and when he needs to put his ears between a text book. Doesn't matter if you think your teacher doesn't like you. What are you going to do when your boss doesn't like you, (By the way that didnt work becasue in the world of Bryant, Bryant would just quit his job and start his own business). Needless to say when he got home we made flash cards and did repeatitive word games to help him learn that Mitrocondria is what turns food into energy (I used a muscle for comparision since they both start with the letter M). He was better and he even told the hubinator right away instead of trying to hide it. Good for him.



I am reading this one blog about losing weight, and maintaining it. She was stagnant like me nad very busy again like me and yet she always found time to exercise and eat right. She has 6 kids I have 1. You do the math.

Now I am snoring and weight close to 250. This in itself makes me feel very sad and unresponsive to anything but another cheese sammich. I need to do something. My knees hurt, my arms are numb at night, my back hurts and I havent run in a year.... at least... I read all of these other blogs about how easy it is and how fast that they lost the weight and that makes me even sadder. I did it once, lost lots of pounds, had the best legs of my life and looks really really good no matter what a wore... ok so my friends courdory jacket kinda scared Brian off the first and only time I wore it in his presence.

I don't know when I am going to start this... I dont want to use pills, but I need to go to the store and get chicken, good food and some good walking shoes... I have a MP3 player for some good music and I can fix my pedometer (Batteries).

So when am I going to do this... I can exercise - before work - on my lunch break - after work.. i dunno... before work and lunch break would seem to work the best... On the weekends I can go to the trach and run/walk laps.

Eating is the hard part - i always want to eat what the hubby is eating.. whether it be ribs, fast food or whatever. I need to do this for me and with or without his support I need to focus on me. Maybe I will meet some awesome handsom guy *swoon*


May is almost gone???

Where has the time gone? This entire year is moving too fast and to top it off, Bryant is now counting down the days till summer, like he has some great trip he is going to go on, or some excited life he is going to lead. Doubtful.

Brian went to play golf on Sunday, it was funny to hear the stories and of course Mr. H had them dimples going on!!

I think that I am going to write about the Moose. Funny stories of course...

this would be chapter 1

When I am talking with friends who have no idea what i do on the weekends they think that my life is full of exciting stories and commentary about the people around me. I am the water cooler, they come to me to hear about what people their same age do on a Friday and/or Saturday night. Well, this Tuessday was no exception. I was getting ready to start digging into my emails when I get a "ping" I look on my Instant Messenger and see Type A personality write, "I am not in a good mood, please humor me" I knew exactly what she wanted, she is like a dog waiting for the biscuit, on the hind legs, drooling, slight whimper. Type A personality was in my clutches, all the while I am thinking, shall i tell the truth, embellish, add a cute guy?

Friday night I went to the lounge, sat up at the bar with a friend and proceeded to have a beer. I brought a few bottles of vodka with me but I wanted to taste the ice cold beer going down my throat, my dry throat, yumm. When you are sitting around the bar - or any bar for that matter. you start listening to the people around you talking. Most of them you know since it is a family bar, and you know most of their family. It is nice in some aspects but then in others it bad because then they know EVERYTHING!!! Hello - leave me alone. Anyways - The lady behind the bar is cool and she is very nice to be around but she alos has that hollerier that thou attitude that is finally getting on my nerves!!! She is listening to everyone, added her two cents, and when I want to say hello dont you have a bar to wipe down, an ashtry to empty or something that will keep you from listening to everyone's conversation...

Then there is the cook. The cook cannot be names because it changes all of the time. Most of the time you have men volunteering to cook, on taco night, pizza night and Monday night you have guys trying to hid from their wives by coming up to the Lounge to cook. They also listen in with a great might and try to find out gossip. True gossipers at the Lounge are the women, for some reason they do more than just wash their hands in the bathroom. As the water runs so do their mouths.

You also have the managers and other staff. Most of the are ready to retire, and no one knows what they will do when these people are gone. You have the Big Cheese, who will do anything for you, no matter what. She is kind and a hard worker. She is also Big Cheese of the saga's that develop at the Lounge. She knows all and is the solver of all Lounge problems. She can go back 50 years when the women were not allowed in the Lounge or how when they were allowed in, they were not able to sit at the bar.

There is more - for another time perhaps......


Long time

Gosh where does the time fly when you are working, going to school and also raising a family, husband included? I feel as though it has been an entire year since I have posted and so much has been going on that I need to document a little bit of what is going on only so I do not forget how much I have to live for.

Weekend was great had a scrapping shindig to attend. It was great and very entertaining especially at 4 am when there was a symphony in the dorm room of everyone snoring, I wish I was snoring too at that time cuz then I know I would have been sleeping!!!!

Go home early evening and just vegged out for the rest of the night. Didn't sleep well, reason being that I think I was dreaming of the cricut machine noises that it makes.


Wonderful memories

So I was reading a post on another blog that I read religiously, and she was talking about how her son fell off a stool and landing on his head. God, as soon as I read that I was floating back in time to when I moved into a house in Idaho, great house right on a creek, and I was in the kitchen unpacking all of the crap I owned. Bryant was 2 at the time and he was dancing in the living room to the music that was playing (Actually it was Barney but I try to block that out of my mind as well) and all of a sudden I heard the noise... a huge thump... the silence... I stood there in the kitchen and waited... scared to go out and see... then fast forward the screams started and I awoke from my shock. I ran to the living room and saw the blood squirting from his head like a pulse and Bryant was crying... I scooped him up and took him in the kitchen. Thank god all of my teaching came handy and I knew that head wounds bleed alot.. ALOT.. so then I held a towel to his head and consoled him. All the while I am thinking in my head omg it is going to take me 30 minutes to get to the hospital and I have no idea where it is. I then got the bleeding to stop and took him to a grandmotherly figure who had raised 4 boys. She was awesome. She said that he could use a stitch but he should be ok, not to let him sleep for awhile, watch his eyeballs, and watch for puking etc. and dont give him any drugs for awhile.

I think that was the most that he had scared me like that.. well until he sliced his hand open on a rusty nail in a tree.. or when I thought he had appendicitis and we go to the Ft Belvior ER only to find out my son has enough poop in him to create his own memorial... bit that is a different post!!



ESTJs thrive on order and continuity. Being extraverted, their focus involves organization of people, which translates into supervision. While ENTJs enjoy organizing and mobilizing people according to their own theories and tactically based agendas, ESTJs are content to enforce "the rules," often dictated by tradition or handed down from a higher authority.
ESTJs are joiners. They seek out like-minded companions in clubs, civic groups, churches and other service organizations. The need for belonging is woven into the fiber of SJs. The family likewise is a central focus for ESTJs, and attendance at such events as weddings, funerals and family reunions is obligatory.
Tradition is important to the ESTJ. Holidays, birthdays and other annual celebrations are remembered and observed often religiously by this type. The ESTJ is inclined to seek out his roots, to trace the family heritage back to honored ancestors both for a sense of family respectability and for a sense of security and belonging.
Service, the tangible expression of responsibility, is another key focus for ESTJs. They love to provide and to receive good service. The ESTJ merchant who provides dependable service has done much to enhance her self image.
ESTJs have an acute sense for orthodoxy. Much of their evaluation of persons and activities reflects their strong sense of what is "normal" and what isn't. ESTJ humor is frequently centered around something or someone being off center or behaving abnormally.
ESTJs promote the work ethic. Power, position and prestige should be worked for and earned. Laziness is rarely viewed with ambivalence nor benevolence by this type.
Some men can make decisions and some cannot. Some men fret and delay under criticism. I used to have a saying1 that applies here, and I note that some people have picked it up. --Harry S. Truman, Mr. Citizen 1"If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen."
The ESTJ is outspoken, a person of principles, which are readily expressed. The ESTJ is not afraid to stand up for what she believes is right even in the face of overwhelming odds. ESTJs are able to make the tough calls.
Occupations attracting ESTJs include teaching, coaching, banking, political office, and management at all levels.

Weekend recap

Well the weekend was good, very boring but good. I was thinking that I have not had sex since November.

I think by listening to my son ask questions about sex, girls, sex, money, sex, and other things unremembered that I have been abstaining to teach him that abstienance rules!!!

He first asked me is doggie style is anal sex. I said no. I did not say anything else until provoked. I did not make eye contact, yes I wanted to avoid this and just tell him, "Say no to drugs and sex", but I had to make sure I was as open as I could be and of course I could hear nothing with my head buried deep in the shag carpet.. speaking of which, who spilled the koolaid. Koolaid was so much simplier time, laughing and kissing boo boos. I get slapped back to reality when he says, "Well, what it is?" What is what I ask... you know... doggie style, omg I had to go there, why cant he wait till his father comes home?

Ok I manage to tell him, next thing I know he is rolling around on the floor giggling and uncontrollably drooling. Whew, there is no way he is having sex any time soon if he still laughs like that. Whew!!! BUT then came more questions. how to cats do it.. where is the penis on a cat or dog... cuz if it was long enough then it would rub on the cement...

Not too shabby. OK next question he asked for this week...

Hey mom there was this kid who had was holding two blue balls and the older kids we laughing at him. OMG...


Mother-Son time

Ok so Bryant and I spent some quality time together tonight watching Serpent and the Rainbow, then he wanted to google "voodoo" and find out more about it. It is odd what will strike a kids fancy but I told him not to screw with the religion, he will find himself in a dark place.

Things have been going. School will be done in 7 days and I cannot wait. I am worried though becuase the people in my Wednesday night group have not been communicating and I am not sure if we are presenting tomorrow night or next week.


In the Beginning

I figure now that my son is 14 years old I can start sharing the story of how he was born. I think I have forgotten the pain by now.

I married his dad in 1990. I knew him for a short while and we got along great. As the years went on we also got along great as long as we were not in the same room. He travelled alot with work, and at that time there was no email, phones or gadgets on aircraft carriers. Just the old fashioned mail system. so we grew apart and I wanted to live and he wanted to party.

I was pregnant many times, each time getting alittle farther along and each time crying my eyeballs out for months after until i got pregnant again. I was married to a person who had no feelings, who did not want to listen and who had better things to do. I had to cope on my own, and I was young too. Oh well. So I get all the genetics testing done and the doctors says... your immune system is killling the fetus. Ok got it, so what do I do to make it stay. STERIODS baby. wonderful suckage drug let me tell you!!!!! Well me and the hubby moved thinking that that would help the relationship, but in all honesty I think he was getting me ready with a cheap ass place so he could bail. We had sex once, I had a cold and we had to christen our new apartment ya know. So then the next few weeks I am dealing with Steve leaving, having a major cold and debating on breaking a lease and moving in with my mother.

Guess what?? hint.. Vomit!!!

yes I was pregnant. Ok so I figure not going to tell anyone cuz it isnt going to last long. I wanted to wait and not tell a soul. I didnt even tell my mother. I was sick alot too, lost some weight and was on the midnight shift (In the military) and so i could sleep all I want. Which I did. I slept all day, when I got home from work, then took a nap around 9, went to work at 1030, then took a cat nap at work. I was in sleep heaven. I still remember to this day how much I would sleep. I only wish I could sleep that much now. Heh!!

I loved to eat that nasty dinty moore beef stew with faktaters, all mixed together. Now the smell makes me sick to my stomach and I haven't eaten it since. (rememebr my son is 14 years old) I also loved cereal, peanut butter, and chili cheese fries.

The smell of bacon would make me vomit, and that was about it. Once I was getting my hair cut, it was ubber long, and I had my first hot flash and I thought I was going to faint and throw up at the same time. Not a good way to feel at a mall, next to a jack in the box (barf). I was able to stay in my clothes for 6-7 months since you could tell i really didnt eat that much and I slept alot. I gained 26 pounds for the entire pregnancy. Not too shabby. When I went back to work I was able to wear the same dungarees I did when i wasnt pregnant (That only lasted a week though, I thought I was going to faint from holding my stomach in.

No one told me about the boobies. I couldn't make up my mind if I should breastfeed or not. So I went back and forth especially since Bryant wasn't eating. All he did for the first three days of his life was sleep away like nothing mattered to him... and of course, did I sleep?? Hell no, I wanted my baby to wake up so I could play with it. So then I get home and since I went to formula, I saw that my breasts were HUGE!!!! So in order to relieve the pressure that was killing me what did I do??? I pumped, thinking that would help... well it did for like an hour.. so I would pump again... and again.... you get the picture... after about a week I gave up and went through the pain.

Pain speaking of which, I also had a epidural headache and was in constant pain until I went back and they scabbed over the insicion. That was pain. Wow and I thought I forgot all about this pain. I guess not, but all good.

So when we got home, bryant had colic. This is when I wanted him to sleep and he wouldn't. he was just not on my side of the team. I did not want him to have colic and I was asking all of my friends. And none of them had kids and one lady said, stick soap up his butt, thats what my mom did to me (he was consipated so I thought that this was why he was colicy) I took him to the doctor but the doc said that I need to feed him 2 ounces then burp him for a few minutes then repeat. I told her that I was allergic (highly) to milk when I was an infant, but did she listen??? nope. So this went on for weeks, then when my old lady of a nanny was getting frazzled, I switched bryant to soy and omg... 2 days later and he was great!!!! He got a huge red butt from the change but omg he was an angel, finally my angel was home. I think this saved him from shaken baby syndrome from that old lady... This is bringing back memories of me standing at her apt door and listening her talk to bryant.... wow!!

Did i tell you that I went through another tramatic experience, besides childbirth?? Well, i was getting ultrasounds all the time since I was high risk. After they told me what I was having, I never had them tell me again, I figured they know what they said...

Well Bryant was supposed to be a girl. Her name was Sydney James. LOL I had a pink baby shower... It was like a pepto bismo party with out the song that they sing. Well when it popped out it had a penis and if my son turns out gay, I will know why... It took me weeks to address bryant as he. It was always... I ned to change her now, I need to feed her... why is she crying.. is she asleep.. and plus with me thinking girl thoughts throughout my pregnancy, one can only wonder...

Did I also tell you that when I would wake up to feed the baby I felt that i had to eat too??? Since it was the holidays, there was muchies all around and oh boy!! And like I said, I didnt breastfed so I didnt get that extra weight lose incentive.

Did I also tell you that my mother would not watch him, would not help. I know some parents are like that she thought that they were so close and always talk. I was living with her, and she wouldn't help. All she did was bitch about Steve not helping. Fun Fun!!!! It's odd, I know that when I am a grandparent I would want to help out my kids and snuggle with the babies and spoil them rotten.