Christmas Past

With times as tight as they are becoming now, I am remembering Christmases in my past that were very short and nothing was under the tree. It brings to light the person that I have become and why the holidays are so important to me. One christmas we had was because of the Salvation Army, who allowed me to pick out a few gifts while they gave my mother a food basket. One Christmas - was grand, because credit cards found their way into my mothers hands. Later on, it would curse us as she would file for bankruptcy. One Christmas there was nothing but a small tree, my mother choose to drink our chirstmas fund. Our Christmases never were really spectacular. When I started working, they turned out better, but not by much. As I grew older I never really got the feeling of Christmas, I felt like I was a pawn in some monsterous game and that some day it would be true that the Holidays are just for rich people. I only had 15 Christmases with my mother, I moved out and became emancipated when I turned 16. Christmases were better, alot better. I would spend the holidays with one of my teachers family, and just the feeling in the house was amazing. I only received practical gifts, which was fine, from people that did not even really know me, but welcomed me into their house, and with open arms allowed me to feast on their wealth of family. That feeling was so overpowering, like the feeling a person gets from their first hit of acid, or herion, you never forget that feeling. I try to copy it every year, and the feeling I create, though good, is not the same as I felt when I was with this family, until this week. I am a member of a Moose Lodge. We do alot of drinking, playing pool, picnics, and road trips. We also do functions and make money for our lodge(men) and chapter (women). This year, I am the head honchette of the women. I dont know what this means except that I am utterly busy and have no time for myself during the busy periods. I was blessed this year, by a wonderful board and my chairman are the best chairmen I think that we have had in a long time. Anyways, I am getting off track here. The chapter raises money for the children at Mooseheart and we also raise money for in house events. This Christmas we recieved many donations of food and money to give to needy people in our area. We have always helped when we could, and this year being no different we picked 4 families to give to. One of our members, has a neighbor who is married with two children. These children are amazing, so full of grace and heartfelt wonder to them that you dont want to break their hearts or spirit at christmas. The husband is an E4 living in DC and his wife is a stay at home mother who takes care of her children and makes sure that there is a nutritious dinner on the table each and every night. I have met her a few times, and when you see her you know there is nothing in her heart except friendliness and love towards her family and I know that she is making that ultimate decision of whether to pay a bill or to buy a gift for her children for Christmas morning. The chapter agreed that we would give her a monetary donation as well as a food basket filled with food, not just for Christmas dinner but for all days. We also, decided amoungst ourselves that we would take up a donation and buy a gift card for the children so they could have presents. Our little group collected 100 bucks in 10 mimutes for this family. This is what Christmas is all about, and when everyone was putting dollars into a bucket that night, that was when I had that same overpowering feeling I had when I felt the warmth and love from people I did not know. I learned that the feeling does come back... when you are ready to let it in...


For the next couple of days, I'm going to get all introspective on you and reflect on the year that was 2008. This is the first segment.
Was 2008 good for you? In some ways yes.. but mostly no. But I did learn alot about myself and what exactly i want from life
What was your favorite moment of the year? the Children's christmas party
What was your worst moment of the year? April 26th 2008.
Where were you when 2008 began? At the Moose With my husband and friends all around.
Who were you with? Hubby and friends
Where will you be when 2008 ends? Same place but differenet spirit
Did you keep your new years resolution of 2008? I didnt make any. I will be changing that this year.
Do you have a new years resolution for 2009? I want to publish a short story and get in shape before I turn 40.
Did you fall in love in 2008? No.
If yes, with who?
Are you still in love? Honestly, I dont know
Did you breakup with anyone in 2008? Kinda
Did you make any new friends in 2008? Yes, I did.
Who are your favorite new friends? ALL of my new friends.
What was your favorite month of 2008? ??? good and bad in every month.
Why this month?
Did you travel outside of the US (or your home country) in 2008? No
How many different places did you travel to in 2008? Las Vegas, california Massacusetts.
Did you miss anybody in the past year? Geez, yes.
What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2008? I don't know. I saw a ton.
What was your favorite song from 2008? 

How many concerts or plays did you see in 2008? None
Did you have a favorite concert in 2008? Nope
What was your favorite book in 2008? Book 4 of twilight
How many people did you sleep with in 2008? None
Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year? Yes.
What was the biggest lie you told in 2008? i love you
Did you treat somebody badly in 2008? Yes.
Did somebody treat you badly in 2008? Definitely.
What was your proudest moment of 2008? Starting another new career at 38 yrs old.
What was your most embarrassing moment of 2008? hmm, I am sure.. omg I cant write it here... but it has to do with laughing then coughing then peeing and then sneaking out of the moose.

If you could go back to any moment of 2008 and change something, what would it be? I would be a different person, one that my husband wanted to be with... it takes two.
Where did you work in 2008? Web design
Favorite TV shows(s) of 2008? Big Bang Theory, The Mentalist,
Favorite Band(s) of 2008? ??? Nickleback
Favorite Food in 2008? Lime and garlic smart pop popcorn
Favorite Drink in 2008? Cranberry and a hint of lime juice
Favorite Place in 2008?
my bedroom

Favorite person(s) to be with in 2008?
How many more questions can I skip?
Favorite person(s) to talk to in 2008?
Favorite trip in 2008? Snowshoe
Most exciting moment(s) in 2008? Moving into a house
Funniest moment(s) in 2008? Anything that made my son laugh
Feel free to answer any, all, or none in the comment section or on your own blog.


Almost Friday

Bryant is still sick. I am finally forcing drugs down his throat along with hot tea, lemon and honey. He has that horrible cough that has been going around and each day I pray and thank god that I have not gotten that cough. YUCK!

It has been raining non stop today, and here I am wishing it was snow. I want a real blizzard LOL.

Friend is doing well, she has a few more weeks before the dreaded day, and I am wondering what I can do for her. Send her flowers? Bake her something, make a meal for her family? I have no clue. I do have her address, so I think flowers are in order. I should make my tater tot casserole for them, since I know her son needs to eat.



Holiday spirit

I need to get Bryant into the holiday spirit. He doesn't want to do anything for the holidays! I do have a feeling that it has something to do with our budget and how I am scrimping for the holidays. I have put money aside for him, so I keep asking him what he wants for Christmas and all I get is nothing is fine. UGH!!! Times like this is when his selflessness comes out and I am truely glad he has that fine quality and I guess I can say he brings it at the right time. I remember when Bryant was little I would go all out on decorations and make sure that the house was a prime example of going overboard and having a christmas house. I would make sure that all of the decorations that he made at school were hung all over the house and we would unlink one link a day on his christmas chain. I had an advent calendar which was a house with doors for each day and I would have candy in them or a small trinket. He thought that was the neatest thing. I also has a Santa Claus that I would take and put in the house, and each night I would put it in a seperate place, so that Bryant would wake up each day looking for it... it was fun..


No title

Plain and simple, it is cold outside. For the first time, I wore a jacket last night! Bryant is starting his weekend off pretty well, he went to Culpepper to play in a pool tournament with Brian. Hope that he does well. He has been playing pool since he was 13 and it is really starting to show. I cannot wait till he wants to be in a league. He might make me some money after all LOL.
I have Daisy the Dog this weekend. She is lounging on the couch and I am wondering why she thinks that she can eat everything that I am eating. As I was typing this sentence I looked around to give my dog a loving glance, then I noticed that she was not on the couch, under my feet or behind me.. OMG I left her outside. I ran to the back door thinking that she might be gone cuz she was not scratching at the door. She was out by the fence looking at something?? But she came in and starting eating the cats food.

Alrighty. time to go christmas shopping.


Dear God

Please make sure my friend makes it through the first week of January and for years afterwards. She is a good mother, a good wife, a good friend, and all of the above. I wish I could do something. I wonder what she is thinking really, not just what she is telling us... I am scared that if it was me, I would not be strong enough to be able to do it.

Mark your calendars....So,I scheduled my surgery today. It's January 5th....double mastectomy, reconstructive surgery and sentinal node biopsy all in one shot. OY! Gulp....it's real now. THUD!


I am such a cool mom. Lasst night I made Bryant's currently favorite meal, mac and cheese and sloppy jo's. After that we vegged out for awhile and then Brian wanted us to go to the Moose with him so he could spend some time with Bryant. We went up there and it was okay. I was tired. But we got home late and I, the responsible parent says, "We HAVE to have birthday cake on your Birthday! So Bryant and I are in the kitchen eating cake at 11pm. That will be something he remembers. And I didnt even complain this morning when he woke up late and asked for a ride to school, I kinda figured that was coming.


Happy Studly 16 to my son!!

Well, today is the big day. My son, is 16. I cannot believe that I have, well either of us for that matter, have made it this far without killing the other. He has put me through every trial and tribulation that is available, and I am sure that there are more to follow. He has proved me stronger that he, he has made me more assertive, more self assured and happy to be alive at times. He has been there for me on each birthday, with a smile on his face and a great big grin when I cook his birthday cake. His favorit is yellow cake mix with chocolate frosting. Yes this is also my favorite and I would not tell him that for years because I was worried he would change his favorite to be something other than mine.

Ten things that he enjoys :
1. Scary movies - he loves these much more than I do and I do enjoy them very much. Right now we are watching "The Descent" (One of my favorites becuase the protagonist actually dies at the end)
2. Gummie bears - I have no clue, but he did take a picture of two of them in a provacative position and had that as a screen saver on his cell phone...
3. Pizza - Pizza Hut, hand tossed cheese lovers pizza.
4. Ice cream sammiches (the mint chocolate chip ones where the ice cream is actually minty green not white)
5. TV Shows - anything comedic - Big Bang theory, how I met your mother and 2 1/2 men are among his favorite
HE LOVES watching cartoons and the disney channel (at 16???)
6. Playing Pool - he learned from me and now he is better than me and ready to join my league..wonder if he will be on my team.
7. Bottled Root Beer is one if his favorite drinks, but he could drink a 12 pack of them in one sitting, scares me to think how he is going to be drinking the real beer.
8. Football, I wish he was better at this because of how much he loves being part of a team, horsing around with them, and playing street ball. He is also on a fantasy football league this year.
9. Scaring people - I dont know if he learned this one from me.. but he loves to lurk in the shadows and scare people half to death. He doesn't care who it is, it could be people that are 90 years old (Sorry Dot and Myra) people that he knows are going to chase him down and kill him or even his mother. He gets such the kick out of it too, we will go for days scaring each other and then Bryant will just stand there laughing and the tears are coming down his face because he is laughing so hard.
10. Friends. he likes being around his friends. He is a good friend, and can get along with most people. He values the friendship.

Ten things that I like about him:
His humor
His Cleanliness, meaning that he will take a shower.. not how his room is a tornado
His Humor
His love of food, this boy will eat anything
His ability to amuse himself
His character
How he treats others
His love for the animals
Did I mention his humor
His ability to cook

Things that scare me:
His Independence. I taught him that he needs to be able to take care of himself and not have to rely on others for anything... I think at times I taught him too well.


Tis the season... come on now

This morning, I heard that another friend is taking her mother in for a biospy today. I am kinda shocked. She is a much older young lady and she is one of the nicest people that you can meet. Also found out that the same friends husband just got laid off of work and his last day will be Friday. He has 4 kids and goes all out for Christmas. This economy is not helping anything. UGH, i hope that things change but I also hope that they change for the better. I can't really think right now... whew!

Made the best Orange Chicken last night, got it from Costco. Had some rice and eggrolls. brought some today for lunch with some broccoli also yummie.


Sunday Sunday Sunday

Four day weekends are great and I am glad that I stayed away from the computer as much as I have. I did get online and fart around but for the most part my job was making the king a happy camper. We went out last night for awhile and he went home after two hours and went to sleep. he is almost over this cold. i bought a humidifier for his room and I hope that helps. This is one of those that you can keep on for 12 hours. Perfect! I am hoping he is going to school tomorrow. He needs to, cuz I need the break. We stayed home today and watched billards on the television. It was nice to just hang out with him and relax. I only went to the store, for snackies and we had a few. I have a great dinner for tomorrow night, orange chicken, rice and chicken and veggie spring rolls. The safeway select spring rolls are the best and they taste much better than ones from a restaurant. YUMMIE.


Bryant is sick, today is day 2. I have pumped so much fluids into him that I believe he might float away. He has been staying in bed for the most part and hasn't been high maintenance at all. But of course as me te mother, I am taking care of him in the best way.

Thanksgiving was great, I did perfect on the amount of food that i ate, and Bryant didn't eat too much - and I took him home right after the dinner which was at a friends house. He started feeling sick at her house, and then 2 hours later he felt like ass. Well, he didn't tell me that but of course a mother knows.

I went shopping this morning, and got a few things for Bryant for his birthday. He is going to be 16, and I have no idea what to get him. He already has a good wallet, and shaver, a place to put his keys and wallet on his dresser. I cannot afford a car yet so that is out of the question. He has the Xbox and does not want any other game console, which of course makes me happy. If you have any ideas please share


Is Cheesecake Evil??

My son has never been evil, but this weekend it got me wondering... He has been on the laptop for most of the weekend, playing WoW. He can play on the game with his friends and I thought for sure he was going to stay up and play the game all night long. He was in bed by midnight and was up around 7 am. I know that child cannot go without his sleep. He can only stay up all night when he stays at Donnie's house and then he comes home acting like an ass, and needs to go take a nap like a toddler when they dont get a nap. I can always tell when he does not get enough sleep, and this kid needs his 8 hours of sleep most nights.

When he was little I never had a problem getting him down for the night, we would both lay in his bed, and I would read a story to him a few times, then I would lay there and talk to him, trying not to show impatience in my voice because I wanted to get him to sleep so I could make a pot of coffee and clean the house. Sometimes I would fall asleep with him and wake up at 1 or 2 in the morning mad at myself! I wanted to stay up and have me time lol. Yes, me time consisted of cleaning the house while my son sleep. This way I was able to play with him during the day and I didn't have to worry about the house getting littered with toys and all the clothes he wanted to try on.,..


Blast from the past

So I got a blast from the past last night. Brian called me, and told me that Steve’s now ex-wife called the house and wanted to talk to me. She left her number. I didn’t do anything at the beginning, since it wasn’t really my call. I never had a relationship with her and hated her for what Steve did to Bryant. Let me regress, about a million years ago a little boy named Bryant was sent to live with his father for six weeks in the summer. His father never saw him any other time during the year and the only reason why he did this was so he would not have to pay child support. So the little boy goes to this house, and stays six weeks, he gets into trouble and has accidents at night in his bed. I am sure it was because he was scared because he rarely did it when he was at home. The father did not understand this and did not care, so he would make the little boy sleep in the kitchen on the floor with a sheet for a blanket. This was a sad time in the little boys life so he started to act out and do things that would get him into trouble. His father sent him home and told him over the phone that he never wanted to see him again. The little boy told me of the things that went on and I called the police in MO but nothing was really done, since there was no child abuse, hell he just made the little boy sleep on the floor… but it was documented I made sure of that in case anything happened again.

Well Diane was nice to Bryant when Steve wasn’t around and I wasn’t sure if Bryant wanted to have a relationship with this woman… she is the mother of Bryant’s half brother… so I wanted to talk to him and ask him what I should do. He was amazingly calm about the entire thing and I was proud of him for the decision that he made. I called and left a message with my numbers on it so she can call back.. Should be interesting to see what happens


My imagination (think birds and trees)

OK so when Bryant was younger, we did not have a car so we walked everywhere. We lived by the beach and everything was close, and if it was too far away there was always the bus. We walked to the beach, grocery store, to and from school. When we would walk to school (I would drop him off then hop on a bus to work) we would always look for things in the area that we could tell a story about. In the mornings it was always focused on Pigeons (san Diego has a million of these) and the birds would be dancing on the telephone lines like Ballerina's and so forth. During the fall months, we would wind up walking home in the dark and we would scare the begeezers out of ourselves. I would do more of the scaring... The trees in the area would not have their leaves and we would pretend that there were witches in them, and the branches would dramatically turn into witches arms as we walked through them.. bryant would want to walk in the street, but since he created part of this I made him face his fears and walk through the trees.
This was an awesome way that we communicated back and forth when we were tired and didnt want to walk all the way home... the only thing that I did was convince Bryant that there were scary monsters in the trash cans that were put out on trash day... LOL

bad bad

He was also scared of the VUG under the RUG.. (Dr suesss) he would always make me skip that page, it was so cute.

My Nights are my own... I think, oh the Drama

Alrighty, I work full time, most of you know this. I expect my son to come home and complete the following:
Clean cat box
Take out trash
Wash his morning dishes
Throw a load of his wash in the washer
Finish his homework

That's all I ask. Most of the time, he does it no problem. He does not get an allowance, he does these things because he lives here and has to be responsible. Once in while, like tonight I get the following...
Why didn't you clean cat box? His response, "Mom, there wasn't anything there" He (my son) covered the droppings up. Now think to yourself.. it takes longer to cover it up than it does to just pick it up. HELLO!

Take out trash.. why didnt this happen... well gee mom, I was so involved with the cat, you are always yelling at me cuz I dont pet the cat. (hence the cat hair now all over the couch)
Wash his morning dishes... well these are done, kind of... I pick the bowl up and I feel crust. GROSS. I am washing the bowl as I am yelling at him, telling him if this happens again I am going to take every single dish and cup out and make him wash them. In the meantime he is laughing his ass off at the door because he thinks it is funny... I guess I had a funny look on my face and I chuckle to myself, thinking that my mother must have told me that a million times... But OMG I was sooo not allowed to laugh.

Wash is done, but he forgot to turn ON the washer
Homework is getting done.

Now when I come home I cook dinner and straighten up a bit, then from 6-7 I watch 90210 (Yes the one from the 80's) this is one of my guilty pleasures. My son now will sit with me on the couch and watch it with me and we will talk about all the dramas that are taken care of in an hour.
Well, tonight he is sitting there, I have cooled down from the non house cleaning animal I live with, and he blurts out that the only reason he has to do so much around the house is so that I can come home and watch 90210 (Joking of course). Hmmp. He then wants a brief synopsis of each character that is on the show. Brief?? I tell him to wikipedia it and tell me what he finds.
He is on a roll tonight.

He is a great kid but sometimes he just doesnt get it. I think that when they become teenagers, the common sense goes out the window for a year or so. His brain must be changing, I read somewhere that during puberty it does change (LOLOLOL hush girls). He turns 16 in a matter of weeks

I'm scared

Football is now over - I can blog

The season of my son's football year is over for now. Every night it was a different place, at a different time, kid gets home between 7-10 pm, I had to cook him dinner, wash his clothes and ensure his homework got done. Needless to say I did not sleep much. I welcome the rest, and knowing that once I go home, I do not have to go out again.

He is now in driver's education. He tests me while I am driving and I hear a faint tisk tisk when I do something wrong while driving, like not making a complete stop at a stop sign LOL. I just laugh and tell him that is fine, that is how you learn. I plan on taking the VA DMV book in the car with me next time he drives. Last weekend we went to Calleo (warsaw) and he drove down with the boys. When we got to our destination, the boys has many stories to tell about Bryant and his driving. They said he took to the right part of the lane so much that the door mirror could have taken out a few mailboxes LOL. I sure hope not, but I am sure it was close.
Hie report card was mailed out yesterday, should be interesting

I have once again moved, this time into a house, that was much cheaper than the apartment. I am saving about 700 bucks a month and trust me, it was well worth it. It is two story, has a back yard, and a front yard full of leaves, which of course I have to rake. I have two parking spots (Awesome!!)

I need to go shopping, I have almost nothing in the house.


Driving me insane

So the great one is driving now and actually not doing too bad of a job. I want him to learn how to drive my car, which is a stick. he has succeded a few times, but when he gets nervous it is all over. Once, we were driving past a polic man and over a speed bump, he stalled and that was all she wrote. next time we were in a merge lane and he had to just go ya know.. well he just went and stalled, then there was someone behind us, who did not honk nor did they become impatient. It was great and if I had enough time I would have walked to the car and personally thanked them for not honking the horn and my extremely nervous already son.

Thank you!


Coming home

Gosh time flew while Bryant was at football camp. I did clean his room a bit.. That boy has some crap let me tell you. Then I found out that they were going to repipe and everything needed to be taken out of the bathrooms and kicthen and some of the closet so I was more busy doing that than anything. They came into the apartment today and tomorrow. i am hoping that they have all of it done by friday so I am not living in a mess for this weekend. It will be nice to see Bryant but he has a rude awakening coming. If he has even thought that he could test my ability of being a mother, this is it. I can't go into detail about it here, but it sure questioned how I brought him up and what type of adult he is going to be.. and no it is nothing bad. Not porn or stuff. I just cant wait to see the look on his face when he knows that I have what he forgot to hide in his room LOL

Oh well


2 days an counting

2 days before the King leaves for Football camp. 2 days more and I can walked around nekkid if I want too. I will actually come home at night and not have to clean up after anyone, cook for anyone, do anyone's wash, chaffeur anyone anywhere. Nice. OMG I am going to be completely bored out of my mind. I started making a list..

1. New Drapes in the living room and my bedroom. I went to Ross today and had 100 bucks worth of purses in my hand.. there were amazing purses there, anyways.. I go to the drape section and threw the purses aside and bought 110 dollars worth of drapes AND rods. I am so excited and already put up 1 rod in my room to see how it would look. I have to go to home depot later and get some better screws. The ones that came with the rods proceeded to take away the plaster instead of making a hole. (they were flat!)

2. Clean the Kings festering area he calls a room.
3. Reorganize my desk area.. it is a basic mess.
4. wash and iron all of my work slack and have everything hanging in my closet at once so I can reorg the closet also.
5. Organize my moose stuff

notice how everything revolves around cleaning and organizing???

And what am I going to be able to blog about? I wont be able to talk to bryant since he cannot take his cell phone or any other electronic device/gadget on the bus. It will be confiscated!!!!!

wonder if I should start recording my soaps again?????


I kinda like Bryant in football. I got so much done this afternoon in the house without him here, manage to tiptoe in his room, to avoid meeting any new friends (mice, ants, a stray dog) and picked up all of his clothes, and I am hoping that they were dirty since of course they were laying on the floor. I made chicken thighs with gravy, mashed taters, and broccoli... now where in the heck is he. It is after 8pm.

okay I went to pick him up. They worked him hard today, he sounds like an old man, whining and complaining while he walks I mean hobbles around the house. He ate two plates full of food, took a shower, gave me his nasty clothes..and proceeded to tell me that the clothes on his floor were clean. Oh boy.

He is now trying to lay on the floor, I advised him against this for fear of him falling asleep and waking up in the middle of the night having to get up off the floor, if he is in bed, he can just roll out and limp to the restroom.

He talks of who does this kind of stuff for free. Why is he doing this... Who talked him into it... this is ridiculous... he says. He thinks that his coach is crazy, I told him that the head coach, coached track last year... bryant then says, no wonder he is making us run so much. He is now sighing in bed.... I told him if he stayed in shape... although honestly he never ever worked this hard at Edison. I think he is going to do well.. and now he is screaming cuz the icy hot is burning his leg. He only ran three and a half miles and did upper bodies weights... and his muscles in his legs are screaming, I wasn't very nice though... I told him that they are going to be doing lower body weights tomorrow, he was not very happy with me. I made him eat on the couch so I could talk to him and since the dining room table is more formal, I wanted him to relax.. he really looked like an old man... .

He is checking his myspace and then going to bed... .this from a kid who was up till 2 am last week at this time.. heh.
I was reading a blog.. isn't that how it always starts??

She was talking about how her son asked if a boy could come over and play, she said no. So what does the son do? He goes and makes the hopeful guest go inside the house and ask.

How many times have you or your child done something of the sort?
Bryant really never had friends to invite over when he was younger. We lived in a one bedroom and he had the bedroom and I had all of my stuff in the living room, so I really wants comfortable with little boys running around in my "bedroom" watching power rangers.

Anyways, when I was a kid and one of us in the neighborhood would get grounded for something someone did... one of us would walk up to their house, and kindly knock on the door, wait for the parent to answer and ask if 'said criminal' could come out to play. We said nothing of 'said criminal' hanging out their bedroom window pleading with one of us to free him from the terrors of his room. Sometimes it would work and 'said criminal' was released with conditions... and sometimes it would not work. When we all figured out what parents are stricter than others, we developed a strategy for getting 'said criminal' out. we would all disappear... one of us would go to house, knock and say, "my mother said that I could come out to play so that I can get out of her hair if "said criminals name' could come out to play with me. We would then disappear and group with the rest of the crew. That was over 25 years ago omg I am old.

My mother would never let me out when I was grounded. She was very strict. I was always the first one to go to sleep in the summer.. it was still light outside and I was what 12??? UGH. I used to have to go get her cigarettes when she was hung over.. so I remember when they were 50 cents for a pack, not cuz i smoked. I would walk down to the liqour store which was next to the bar my mom would hang at, and have a note from my mother, which was sooo unreadable, since her hands were shaking... those were the times.


Growing up yet again

So Bryant got his drivers learner's permit on Saturday, Brian even took him on the busiest highway in America, I95. Was only for a mile or so but still, he let everyone know it. He still has much learning to do since he thinks that he can drive everyone home at night and is trying to get all of the hours that he can until he can get his liscense, he has about a year...

We hardly did anything today, lounged watched the boob tube, made pizza rolls, watched 21, and went to pool. I did not get up until almost 11 am, and that was nice in itself. I got some yarn, thinking of starting another blanket soon.

Oh AND!!! I get to throw a b-day party for Bryant when he turns 16. I think that this is going to be great.


Such the busy life we lead

I am taking Mr B to get his drivers permit this week, he failed the test the first time, and now he gets to take it again and he is starting to quiz himself and also trying to get me to give a wrong answer. OMG and I did!!! I am so not telling which question I missed, and I do not plan on changing my rules of this practice and the book just does not make any sense. Welcome to Virginia right??

Friday night he worked at the lodge while I talked with the girls and I only had 2 beers and then water the rest of the night, I had to get up early to go to New Market for golfing. Mr B decided at the last minute to stay home, but he kept the dog for me.

I also told him that we are going to the bank this week and getting him a checking account. He needs to learn to budget his money and I know he would have more to save if he would deposit it. So I need a bank within walking distance, and also that provides online access so I can keep track of it. We also started talking about interesting and reporting it to the government (he asked) and then I started to explain CD's and he thought I was talking music. This was funny. I explained to him that CD's are often better than some of the alternatives and when he goes to college and gets lump sums, budget the money and then stick the rest in a 6 month CD. I will have to get some literature of this to him. It is never too early.

We also put together a chores list. I am sure he is going to have roommates since he wants to move out of the house so fast adn I want him to be able to keep a clean house. He had to pick two days to cook, sunday being one of them and he is excited for the most part but since he picks days for the chores I also had to explain to him that if it is dirty then just take it out then, without waiting for the day to arrive. There is nothing magical about this day so he should just do it when he sees it.

We tried that pasta from pizza hut.. well he tried it. I had one piece of pizza and I was done, way too greasy..


We are going to Richmond for the weekend. Have a convention to go to. Bryant and his friend are also coming, last time that they went with us, they both hooked up with girls, hooking up meaning talking to them, and I am thinking that they are going to be there this time becuase both of the boys are admant about going. They even went to the store to buy snacks and things. Interesting if you ask me. i am still hounding Bryant about getting some sort of job to help with his end of the bargain, he wont be working this friday so he wont have any money next week. He is so not going to be bumming off of me.

Anyways, things are starting to fall into place with the new house. I am getting accustomed to it and finally starting to fall asleep before midnight, which is great and I have not had to take a sleeping pill for a few days. I am glad.


Boy driver on the road... I think not

He went for his drivers test in Virginia. WITHOUT looking at the manual. I did not take him, I figure that the man child could take him and they could do man child stuff in the car if Bryant would have passed the test.


He gets home... Mom, I missed 6... Anotherwords, I say.. you failed. No I am not too politically correct when he does not study for a test, he deserves what he gets. So we went over the questions that he had missed and I knew the answers as soon as he asked the question. I told him some of the answers will come as common sense when you start paying attention when you are driving with someone instead of living in your own world. He needs to start watching.

Anyways other than that things have been non eventful. We both have been working and tryingt o kee afloat with the chores at home and trying to find something good on the tele, we watched the mole last night, nbot sure if I like it this season. I am trying to figure out what happened to Amazing race.

I meet with Bryant's counselor for next year, sometime in August, will have to call for an appointment.

Just a quick update, nothing earth shattering to report!


No title for this one

I am sure that soon B will not be around long enough to have anything to write about. I enjoy reflecting most of the time, but sometimes it is nice to experience things that bring happiness not moments of terror.

Last weekend I could not go to sleep, B and D were at the movies right down the street and it was midnight, I texted him and asked him when he would be home, he said movie is almost over, be home right after that. I couldn't sleep till he was home.

He is going to be driving soon. I have no idea if he is sexually active... I will be thinking of drinking and driving or the use of drugs in his teenage years and wondering if he is going to fall prey to things of that nature. He has plenty of friends who have done drugs according to him. He knows that it is not something that he wants to do, but minds change every day. He is the only one of his friends that still have to check in with a mother. I demand that he calls me every two hours unless he is out with friends and he has a set time he is going to be home. I check on him at night to make sure that he does not sneak out of the house, and so far I have been lucky. He always asks me and usually I say yes be back in an hour or I just point blank, no. I have no idea what I am going to do when he is 17. OMG that is only 2 years away.

I remember the simple days when all I had to do to make him happy was make him a grilled cheese sammich and tomato soup. Or when he started riding his bike over to Maggie's neighborhood when we lived on the West coast. I enjoyed times when we would walk to school together and we would point out the birds dancing like ballerina's on the phone lines. It is amazing but he still remembers the walks, the scary witch tree, stopping at Roberto's on Friday's for tacos, the liqour store that had the best lemon pies and the smell of Dorito's on the bus, and no I have no idea why he remembers that.
So what has the Boy been up to lately? Since school has ending on Friday and there have been good grades all around he has not moved from his bedroom. He has eithe rbeen in front of WOW or playing XBOX. This of course is not true. I demand that he has conversations with other people that does not require a headset and a excellent connection to the internet, so he had to work at the moose on Friday. He made lots of money and was ready to collapse. Since it was the grand opening of the new part of the building, he had a friend come up to help him and then I was also helping, we were slammed. Both the boys walked away with about 110 bucks a piece. They didn't even offer to give me anything, but the next morning they were both up at 630 to help an older lady with her yard sale and they stayed there all day. He is going to start his construction job tomorrow so that will also keep him busy. He is trying to save up money to buy his car this year. OMG he is growing up.


Sick boy

Poor boy is sick today and he is not getting any sympathy from me. I am working from home, as I always do on Fridays and he is leaving for school, "Oh must be nice to stay home today" then he slams the door and proceeds to the bus stop. He then CALLS me from his cell phone and asks why i get to stay home today. He does not realize everything it entails and thinks that I am going to sleep on the couch while he grinds away at school while sick. I then told him, "If you did not ditch so much or even if you did not stay home last friday I would have been more than pleasant to the idea of allowing you to stay home today." Oh he says. End of conversation. I told him I would pick him up. Guess that wasn't good enough for him.

He is getting older and even though he is not Brian's I see many mannerisms getting passed along. Some are good, like the cleaning and the over thinking, but some are bad.. like the calling me as soon as he leaves the house and try to give me a guilt trip. Hah! So not going to happen.

He got his interim this week and the grades are very good. I was proud of him and I let him know that!


Signs of the times

When B was little and I was a single mother I can honestly tell you I was not the best supreme mom there was to have around. He tested me in ways that no one has ever before. I have had hair pulled out of my skull, been head butted so hard I had a goose egg and started screaming in agony when my son went missing from with women’s clothes aisle, only to find him playing in the skirt rack.

I remember being on a small military base with him while his dad was out doing god knows what, but we were in the commissary and at this time B wanted to test who could hoodwink who first. He started in with his moronic 2 yr old antics, I ignored them for awhile, until I could feel my blood boiling underneath my skin, so I picked him up, hard and firm and all you hear throughout the entire store was… owww mommy your hurting me. Little shit. So then everyone is looking at me, wondering what in the hell I am doing to this poor child… LOLOLOL asshole. Or when you try to pinch them to get their attention and all you get is a Oh mommy your pinching me LOLOLOL

Then there was the times where is would have a holy pitch fit and I just stood there watching him, that would piss him off. Then I would just pick him up and go throw him on his bed in his room.. once, the fit didn’t stop and come to realize when I threw him on the bed he bounced up and hit the corner of his head on the dresser.. UGH.. so what does any good mother do? I moved the dresser for next time.

Never believe that Silence is golden. Something is waiting to happen. When you know that the kids are in a room quiet, and you don’t see the cat, something is going terribly wrong.


My Hero,My Packrat

I love days like this. I went home early because my stomach was killing me and I was in bed when B got home. He came upstairs asked me how I was and then asked if I finished the wash. I was pissed, why the hell am I going to worry about doing the wash when I am ready to barf out the window??? I didn’t say anything just moaned a bit, knowing that I was going to have to get up soon and start being a mother and a wife again.
I go downstairs to see what he is doing and he is folding the wash and put the load in the dryer for me. He didn’t complain, bitch or whine. That is my man and I hope he remembers that for when his wife is sick. That is if he ever gets married. He doesn’t want to get married until he can afford it, which in teenage man brain it means, “until I don’t want to party anymore”!

He has been stressing a bit with the homework, had two projects due today. He was finishing the one up last night and was looking through his notebook for his work cited worksheet. Everything was on his floor and me the typical mother screams out, “OMG the cat just pissed all over your papers!” You should have seen his face. Actually I wanted to yell out in a non motherly voice, "ya know if you were more organized you would be able to find it". I did say that soon after and I got the typical teenage, "I like it like that, helps me find things." Five minutes later, I say the, “I really hate to say this but, you would not be looking for it right now if it was organized.” Yes, I am asking to have my head explode (Big Bang Theory) but I just HAD to sound like my mother, although it sounds better coming from me…

He found the paper…

Big B for president

Well, a friend of mine and I were discussing women's lib this morning we think we have solved all of the United States issues...

Homelessness - since women are part of the main workforce, this is taking jobs away from people who are now living below or at poverty. If the women refused to burn their bras in the 70's I could be home right now watching my sons first steps instead of a child care worker who is getting paid minimum wage to watch 10 children.


Drama for the week all summed up on one page

Well, this week was a very slow week. Bryant had spring break off and he had nothing to do. He did make the best of it.

Sunday night stayed up till 2 am, slept till Monday at 11 am. Played Xbox, did a few things that I begged him to do around the house. And that was the rest of his weekend in a nutshell. He spent the night at Donnie's, one can only imagine that there was no sleeping going on and a bunch of crank phone calls to girls cell phones in the middle of the night. They are all going to see "Shutter" tonight. Freaks I swear, I am glad though that he likes scary movies like I did at his age. They are a bit more predictable and he loves gore.. more the gore the better.

Note to self - make sure he does not eat meat today.

I am so ready to eat a big fat cheeseburger next friday! NO guilt. I am so sick of the fish at the Moose, and no I really dont want to go anywhere else on a friday night LOL.

I have to go to the bank, grocery store and the ABC store today. whew.. Ill be ready for a nap.
Meeting the girls at the Moose around 430, should be a long night LOL.

I saw one of Bryant's ex girls at the bowling alley last night, she is really nice and I wish it would have worked out. Oh well, they are young... I can see them hanging out again.


Yes another OMG

Did I tell you I got The Boy's report card. Needless to say I am keeping it to myself for fear of starting WWIII in my house. I do not wish to argue, wince, crawl for cover, or leave the house for any reason. I must do this for the sanity of myself as well as my family. He is grounded, he knows this and he promised me that he will get his grade up as soo as possible and bring me notes home.

I have no idea what i should do...


OMG run for the hills

289 more days till Christmas...


Weekend went very well, The Boy got an application to a nursery for the spring/summer months for employment. He looks at the application, and says, "I should have gotten two of them." At first I thought he meant for his friend, but then he spouts off that he can't erase on the paper. I told him to write it down on paper first and then write neatly ont he application. He starts reading off the questions...

Employment history - So what do they want here he says.. ummm your employment, well he states that he has never worked anywhere before, so i start spouting off places that he has volunteered at, including the Moose where he WORKS every friday night. DUHHHHH

It's going to be a long year LOL. Then we start talking about careers where you dont need a college education, he now wants to be a truck driver...

I was saved though, he started talking about the FBI and CIA, and then we started talking about computers and how good he is and I told him all of the super secret things that he could be doing if he goes to college or joins the military LOL

yes saved...


Bryant and my husband have not been getting along for the past few days. It hasn't been good and I am hoping it is just a thing. Hubby wont let up on him though and I do not know whether to stick up for him or back up the other one. I hate being in the middle!! I seriously think that we are going to have problems soon, it has been awhile. I just have to make sure that I stick to my ground and dont go running out the door as I have in the past. I have been grounded for about a year, and trust me with my husband that is not an easy feat. I am thinking it is time for a vacation again.


A not so pleasant memory

Remember when -

I just left Bryant's dad, and moved to Idaho to think things through and chill out. I moved into this real nice house, with a fireplace, 2 bedroom, nice huge kitchen and backyard with a creek. Bryant was 2 I think. Well, I was in the kitchen unpacking and Bryant was in the living room listening to Barney and dancing.

Then I heard the Thud. The type of Thud that you do not want to find out what happened. The type of Thud where you just stand there waiting for another noise to follow. The type of Thud where the time ticks by and all you hear is the background noise of the television. Then you hear the scream and it shocks you out of shock per say, the scream where you are afraid to look but grab a towel just in case...

He was standing there with the blood squirting out of his head like a pulse. He was dancing and smacked his head on the mantle of the fireplace, which was real brick not fake brick... I took the towel and applied pressure all the while looking at his eyes and holding him like any mother would. Thoughts of omg what am I going to do were shooting through my head, where was the hospital, how would I get him down there, where can I go. While trying to remain calm for his sake and knowing full well that this was going to be an "up all night affair" since this happened at 7 and there was no way in hell I was going to lay him down. The bleeding finally stopped and the gooseegg started.. Thank god. When I got the bleeding to slow down, I wrapped him up and went to the neighborhood store, and asked for help. There were two older ladies there and their advice saved my life. Yep he sure did knock the nogging, big ole bruiser is going to be there. Yep there will be a scar, nah as long as his eyes, breathing and gooseegg look fine then all is good. I stayed up all night holding him making sure that he was ok, and breathing, and not dreaming nightmares that would take him away. I would feel myself doing touch and go's then waking myself up and having more coffee or watching whatever channels that they had up there to watch, I don't even remember.

My girlfriend came over the next morning, she hear about what happened at the store and came to take B so I could get some rest.

Yes, he does have a scar...


I have to work
I have to go to Moose meetings for 3 hours
I have to go and play pool at hard times...

what will my son be doing during this time?? I asked him to make himself dinner, something healthier than popcorn and ice cream. He thinks that his brain is going to burn it off while he is sitting there watching Spongebob. He usually is not a picky eater and will eat anything that I make but is too lazy to make it himself. Normal teenager. Then when I do get home he wants to complain that there is nothing to eat in the house and that he is starving and is going to pass out at any moment. I ignore it and walk up the stairs....

HUMPH he say....


Skiing weekend

Well, my son is a new daredevil. He went down as many blacks as he could in one day. The first day of skiing we all went down the bunny hill then Bryant and Brian started going down the greens and the blues with no hesitation. Bryant fell a few times and then got his act together. Ash and I stayed on the bunny slope and then after lunch we went down the greens. They werent that bad either, but I enjoy sports with my feet planted in the ground, and they were a few times this weekend when I walked down a hill or too becuase I would rather look like an ass walking than falling (flaying) on my ass going down the same hill.

The nights were fun. The skiing was fun, and I was very excited to finally have a family vacation.


Remember when?

Remember when...

He started laughing at his own jokes
You started laughing at his jokes
He would wear your high heels around the house
He would snuggle right next to you
He wouldn't mind if you sat in the bathroom as he took a bath
He took a bath
He would put worms in his pockets only to find them dead when he got home
He loved the storied you told
He would hold your hand
He would just come up to you hold your face in his hands and kiss you
He would say "Mommy, I love you"
He would splash in puddles
He thought that you were awesome
He would be excited when you picked him up from school
He would stand in his crib and yell for mommy, mommy, mommy
He thought you had all of the answers
He started having conversations with you
He wanted to sleep in your bed
The first time he choked on a tortilla chip
The first time he had an uncontrollable fever
When he got the chicken pox and you couldnt go anywhere with him
When he thought girls were yuckie
When he was scared of the Vug under the rug


Human Garbage Disposal

Why does it seem when boys hit a certain age that they must gorge themselves on everything in the house? My son eats healthy - he eats fruit veggies, meats, and also anything else that is not held down by cement. One day i could have sworn he ate my car keys.


It's not fair??? To whom I ask

Bryant [9:01 AM]:
hey mom i have a deal
Bryant [9:01 AM]:
hold on
Mom. [9:01 AM]:
Bryant [9:02 AM]:
Bryant [9:02 AM]:
you know how your computer is doing that thing
Bryant [9:03 AM]:
Bryant [9:03 AM]:
if i pay for that with my work money cause it was sorta my fault
Bryant [9:03 AM]:
and you know how you found wow
Bryant [9:03 AM]:
well if i pay for it with my money for you to fix your comp
Bryant [9:03 AM]:
can i continue playing WOW as long as i dont pay for the extra stuff
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
how are you playing WOW now?
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
cause i found a way to get mempbership
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
because you know those gift cards
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
what gift cards?
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
i can use those
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
and well
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
the best buy ones??
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
when i was playing
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
the credit card gift cards
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
i didnt use brians gift
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
i had another one but i used it playing WOW
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
what credit card gift cards...
MOM. [9:04 AM]:
who got you one of those
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
i did
Bryant [9:04 AM]:
i bought one for me and brian
Mom. [9:04 AM]:
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
i had money
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
Mom. [9:05 AM]:
good idea
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
and michele said she bought me one
Mom. [9:05 AM]:
wow I am impressed
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
so can i?
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
for christmas
Mom. [9:05 AM]:
how in the heck can I get rid of that crap that keeps on getting on my puter?
Mom. [9:05 AM]:
you know you will have to pay skip back the money he gave you
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
Bryant [9:05 AM]:
but see i ws talking to skip on the game
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
and i told him not to bring it up to y'all
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
and i said since its easier for me to kill stuff
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
if i play you gold
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
he said ok
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
Bryant [9:06 AM]:
it works out
Bryant [9:07 AM]:
so can i?
Mom. [9:07 AM]:
omg and if you get caught you cant be all like
Bryant [9:07 AM]:
i promise i wont pay for any of the gold or nothing
Mom. [9:07 AM]:
oh my mom let me on
Bryant [9:07 AM]:
i wont
Bryant [9:07 AM]:
but i wont get caught
Mom. [9:07 AM]:
you finish your projects this week/weekend and I will think about it
Bryant [9:07 AM]:
ive been doing it for like a month now
Bryant [9:08 AM]:
im almost done
Mom. [9:08 AM]:
Bryant [9:08 AM]:
i do it in this class
Mom. [9:08 AM]:
i want to see them
Mom. [9:08 AM]:
Bryant [9:08 AM]:
i just used that for a excuse to get on
Bryant [9:08 AM]:
Bryant [9:08 AM]:
and since i already paid for it for awhile
Bryant [9:09 AM]:
i dont want to waste my money lol
Mom. [9:09 AM]:
Bryant [9:09 AM]:
Bryant [9:09 AM]:
yopu know u love me
Mom. [9:10 AM]:
yes I do and that is why I dont want to see you get into trouble
Bryant [9:10 AM]:
and it kinda keeps me good aruond the house lol
Mom. [9:10 AM]:
well.... you bring me a report every week on what you are doing in each class.. if they are c's and above you can get on... anything lower then I change the password
Mom. [9:11 AM]:
how is that?
Bryant [9:11 AM]:
Bryant [9:11 AM]:
so when does it start
Mom. [9:11 AM]:
when you bring me a report home
Bryant [9:11 AM]:
like next quarter?
Mom. [9:12 AM]:
you can bring me one home today.. a note from the teacher is fine
Bryant [9:12 AM]:
well thats not fair
Mom. [9:12 AM]:
why not



I dont understand how these kids can do this. I remember babysitting at this age and yes i remember how the kids got on my nerves and knowing that I was too young to be doing this by myself, but I still would have never hurt anyone. My son was babysitting for awhile until the neighbors moved away and i wont let him do it anymore just because I cant be close by to help him if the need ever rose. I just dont understand how it is "ok" to beat a child with a baseball bat. I am also at odds if the parents should be charged, I mean wouldnt they know if their son had little patience and did not like to be bothered at certain times? I know when I babysat no one cared if I had patience or not because I was used so that my mother and her friends could go out drinking and get messed up. I swore I would never do that to my son, and I have kept my promise to him.